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April 25, 2008 11:57am by David Farrar

Car Caption Contest

Captions welcome. The person who sent it to me suggested it represented NZ’s direction under Labour 🙂

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Comments (61)

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East Wellington Superhero

Mike Williams favourite car.
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April 25, 2008 12:01pm
ghostwhowalks3

MIke Williams is Mother Theresa compared to Slippery Key. I counted 7 lies in Keys recent agenda interview ( plus not knowing Jenny Shipley signed the Kyoto treaty) and starting way back denying he had any offers of support from the Brethren

[DPF: 10 demerits off topic]
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April 25, 2008 12:15pm
Jack5

First of the new court-ordered refits for boy racers’ cars.
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April 25, 2008 12:15pm
big bruv

ghost

Good job that nobody here gives a fuck what you think then aye.

If you are REALLY worried about pollies telling lies then you should read Absolute power, I do however suspect that you are simply displaying faux outrage because if you were genuinely worried about lies you would be demanding the resignation of your leader.
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April 25, 2008 12:34pm
Redbaiter

Built by one of the companies supported by Jimmie Anderton’s “Jobs Machine” initiative-

Sovereign Autos Ltd.

Company Director- I M Acronyist.

Secretary- I Kisscommiearses

Financial Officer- Rob Yousuckers
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April 25, 2008 12:35pm
Redbaiter

“Good job that nobody here gives a fuck what you think”

Just the usual cowardly smears and false allegations that the left specialize in. Couldn’t prove any of it. These people are just low life vermin totally devoid of principle and self respect, motivated by hate and envy and their lust for power, and in the end, just sad insane ranters who in their multitudes, are a millstone around the neck of civilization. The book he really should read is-

———————————————————-

The Liberal Mind (The Psychological Causes of Political Madness)

By: Lyle H. Rossiter, Jr., M.D.

Are Liberals Out of Their Minds? Why do modern liberals think and act as they do? The radical left’s politics and its destructive effects on our basic freedoms have provoked many to speculate on what makes these people tick. “The Liberal Mind” answers these questions. This book is the first systematic analysis of the political madness that now threatens to destroy the West’s greatest achievement: the American dream of civilized liberty.

In his penetrating analysis, Dr. Rossiter reveals modern liberalism’s assaults on:

The freedom of adults to make good lives for themselves by cooperating with others
The ability of families to raise children to be self-reliant and mutual
The morals, rights and laws that protect our freedoms

“Modern liberalism’s irrationality can only be understood as the product of psychopathology. So extravagant are the patterns of thinking, emoting, behaving and relating that characterize the liberal mind that its relentless protests and demands become understandable only as disorders of the psyche.” “The Liberal Mind” reveals the madness of the modern liberal for what it is: a massive transference neurosis acted out in the world’s political arenas, with devastating effects on the institutions of liberty.

The author is an MD who received his medical and psychiatric training at the University of Chicago and served for two years as a psychiatrist in the U.S. Army. He is currently in private practice in Chicago.

———————————————————

BTW, for the uninitiated, the term “liberal” as used here includes the progressives, communists and socialists who have claimed the word and daily abuse it as they do so many other such words. Its why I prefer ‘pseudo liberals.’ Liberal in the traditional sense meant something light years removed from the word as it is commonly used today.
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April 25, 2008 12:50pm
East Wellington Superhero

C’mon guys, it’s a photo caption contest!
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April 25, 2008 12:56pm
Redbaiter

The car we’re going to use to drive our way back into the top half of the OECD.
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April 25, 2008 1:07pm
NoCash

“The power of creativity and Photoshop.”
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April 25, 2008 1:09pm
getstaffed

“… but we ordered BMW’s”

The person who sent it to me suggested it represented NZ’s direction under Labour

If that were true there would be no headlights, no windscreen and it would be going backwards, not sideways!
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April 25, 2008 1:18pm
Adolf Fiinkensein

Cullenomics
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April 25, 2008 1:49pm
Adolf Fiinkensein

David, you must take to leaving large doses of valium around for these poor bastards like GWW who suffer so horribly from KDS.

Have some sympathy for them when the next opinion poll comes out with a twenty point margin in favour of John Key’s National Party. Their sphincters will quiver, their colons will undergo violent peristalsis, their gluteus maxima will palpitate and their acidic stomach contents will be sprayed uncontrollably all over their mouldering keyboards.

It’s enough to make a grumpy old rightie sleep with a gentle smile on his face.
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April 25, 2008 1:55pm
Mark

Cullen: I’ve got my foot flat on the acclerator and we are going nowhere.

Helen: Don’t tell me, I never notice the speed we are travelling at.
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April 25, 2008 2:44pm
Rex Widerstrom

Trevor: I really think it was a mistake letting MC Escher design our new Ministerial limos.
Helen: Yes, Trevor, but he’s a huge donor to the Labour Party and you know that comes with certain privileges. Oh crap, he’s coming over for a photo op. You ankle tap him while I pretend to be fascinated by one of his paintings.
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April 25, 2008 2:49pm
Bob

Car to be used to sideline Labour next election.
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April 25, 2008 2:56pm
GPT1

Brought to you by the same team who designed the Electoral Finance Act…

Ghostie you really are a prize pillock. Even if your allegations had a shred of reality to them you can only resort to maybe we’re bad but you’re bad too? Such powerful argument.
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April 25, 2008 3:01pm
tim barclay

The car represents the Electoral Finance Act for the Labour Party. They thought it was going to take them to the road to victory but instead it is driving the Labour Party sideways.
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April 25, 2008 3:13pm
dave

Mike Williams thought he was clever buying a blue car until he let off the brake to get his car going after his ignition failed.
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April 25, 2008 3:38pm
JC

“Our party has broad appeal to both left and right”.

JC
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April 25, 2008 3:46pm
daveski

Labour’s 2008 Model – the all new Dodge Everything. Automatic pilot steers to the left. Mad in NZ (you’d have to be to support this lot). Comes in any colour so long as it’s red, red, red, … red like a fire engine!
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April 25, 2008 3:52pm
dad4justice

Is this a Liarbour Heathermobile? My Batmobile would crap all over if it was.
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April 25, 2008 4:08pm
dad4justice

Is this a Liarbour Heathermobile?
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April 25, 2008 4:09pm
dad4justice

This looks like an undercover Liarbour HeatherSinmobile.
Can I expect this speeding faster than a speeding bullet through Rolleston again with Aunty Helen pledge cards flying out the windows again? I do hope not.
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April 25, 2008 4:18pm
Paul Marsden

Its actually Labour’s Pivotmobile…Designed to stay on one spot and go around in circles….in either direction
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April 25, 2008 5:40pm
John Dalley

No definitely John Key still trying to figure out what he actually stands for.
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April 25, 2008 6:25pm
capills_enema

These jokes are not only funny, they have a deeper political significance.
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April 25, 2008 6:36pm
Strutta

Don’t ask any questions! I know which direction is best for you.
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April 25, 2008 6:43pm
Steve

Caption?
“This is designed by a commitee, for a commitee”
Nobody is responsible.
You will notice no doors, just an escape hatch on the side / rear.
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April 25, 2008 6:43pm
Strutta

David, If you took demerits off GWW3 for an off topic comment, it is only fair that you do the same for others….just sayin’.
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April 25, 2008 6:44pm
Lee C

After the Election Finance Act fiasco, Burton retired from politics and took to designing motor cars…..
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April 25, 2008 6:57pm
Inventory2

“Roger nome – why don’t you get into your twisted car and bugger off!!”
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April 25, 2008 7:58pm
spector

Labour – Going forward in all directions.
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April 25, 2008 8:07pm
sonic

I now realise that David has invented a new definition of “off topic”

It now is defined as , “lefties raising issues I find uncomfortable”

Unless of course someone can explain why ratbleaters comment is not as “of topic” as ghostwhowalks3.

Anyway I wouldnt worry, if this is Labours vision I can only assume John Key will be endorsing it on Monday!

😉
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April 25, 2008 9:23pm
Paul

This is too easy, it’s a blue car so obviously it’s Key’s car. Why?

1) Simply it’s doesn’t know it’s ass from it’s face, and while one leg wants to go one direction in the morning, the other wheel want’s to contradict that by the afternoon.

2) It can only do sideways shuffles instead of going forward.
2a) in going sideways it accepts policy that were once “abhorrent” or “morally repugnant” as now ‘politically expedient’ (student loans)

3) It’s basing policy on pretty date assumptions – the country has defeated ‘vouchers’ year in and year out – get over it (as the advert says).

4) It’s the car of choice of gangsters, so no problem there, it’s a shifty bugger and more than enough room to hide a ‘reclusive’ bretheren or two – even if the outside says “look no ghosts in here’

5) Like all old cars it’s more than likely a waste of time throwing money at it, which is a pretty good indicator that planned borrowings to make it look good (tax cuts) are throwing bad money at it for aesthetics only.

6) it’s going to be bloody funny watching the hasty retreat after the next election defeat in this car – which way will National go this time – religious extreemism, Wishartism?

7) like National Policy, it’s all done with mirrors and photoshop, that is there is only a tentative grip on reality and we are yet to see the real thing.
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April 25, 2008 10:26pm
Michaels

The wheels on the car go round and round………….. round and round…………..
round and round………….. The wheels on the car go round and round………….. round and round…………..round and round…………..
Mike and Helen are in the shit…. in the shit…. in the shit…
OH DIDDUMS!!!
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April 25, 2008 10:29pm
Peak Oil Conspiracy

DPF:

Could you please confirm my suspicion (which I’ve had for a while now) that Ghostwhowalks is the same poster who previously went under the alias “Selma Bouvier”?

See this thread. Topic was Paris Hilton. Selma’s off-topic opening contribution on that thread: “Will John key be visting her in Jail ?” Selma’s off-topic opening contribution to this thread: “MIke Williams is Mother Theresa compared to Slippery Key.” In fact, both Selma (back then) and GWW (now) display an uncanny trait of turned pretty much any thread topic into a discussion about John Key or National.

Does anyone else see a pattern?

Oh, and just for the record, GWW is lying about “count[ing] 7 lies in Keys recent agenda interview”.
See here for the way GWW counts the interviewer’s questions and attributes them as lies on Key’s part. GWW is even more dishonest than Roger Nome/Phillip John – and that’s saying something!
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April 25, 2008 10:37pm
ISeeRed

Some real snappy captions there, Paul. 😉

Here’s my go:

Now EVERYONE can parallel park!

Introducing the limited edition, deluxe Rich Prickster from Cullen & Clark Motors – “Going Nowhere Fast”
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April 25, 2008 10:37pm
polemic

The New Zealand Foreign Ministers Crown Car –

Specially adapted for the current foreign minister Winston Peters who will take it on all foreign ministerial visits so that he can make it look like he represents the Govt yet he can be actually proceeding at complete right angles to it.

P.S. GM motors have said that this is one off collectors item as no other Country in the western world would dare to allow such a constitutional absurdity!!
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April 25, 2008 10:55pm
ISeeRed

“…deluxe limited edition…” would’ve sounded better. *sigh*
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April 25, 2008 10:57pm
Paul Marsden

I don’t care who’s farkin car it is, which way the wheels are facing or, what damn colour it is either. Just give me a friggin tax cut (and NOW!)or, I’ll take take myself, skills and business, and park it in Oz. (Sheesh!)
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April 25, 2008 11:00pm
Peak Oil Conspiracy

Does TV1 still screen Facelift? If so, imagine the masculine satirical pisstake on Helen Clark, and then read my suggested caption:

Mike, you misheard me. I said I wanted Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, the flying car that will get me to the rugby match on time.
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April 25, 2008 11:06pm
mavxp

“New Zealand. Regardless of who is driving, we always seem to be headed for the drink”
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April 26, 2008 12:38am
roger nome

DPf: I love You, I love you, but I love you! But we only have 14 hours yo save the earth!
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April 26, 2008 3:13am
roger nome

I h* fags
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April 26, 2008 3:17am
roger nome

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMz-wi50ACU
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April 26, 2008 3:19am
NZD.JPY

hehe sonic complaining that DPF isn’t playing fair.
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April 26, 2008 4:24am
the deity formerly known as nigel6888

sometimes phillipjohn it isnt wise to get drunk and let your prejudices hang out. You seem to have some pretty serious issues with your sexuality. So now you hate gay people as well as intellectually disabled people. and you spent all yesterday having issues with women – what with despising what you desire and all.

Some advice from your local deity. Get a grip, drink less, seek help, and never go on the internet unless sober.
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April 26, 2008 8:40am
Frank

Helen Clark’s Secret Weapon – Her Spin Machine. Impounded for Speeding- No WOF- Extreme noise- Huge carbon emmission – Danger to the Public.
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April 26, 2008 8:50am
Inventory2

Rust never sleeps; nor does roger nome!
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April 26, 2008 8:52am
Ross Miller

Jim Anderton … “ok, ok, yes we buggered up on Sovereign Yachts but this one’s a real winner.”
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April 26, 2008 8:55am
labrator

Helen Clarks new ministerial limo was consigned to her backyard in Mt Eden when major failures in its design were found. The designer claimed it was built as specified but was fired regardless. Helen said the designer was obviously confused as she has no recollection of specifying the colour as National blue. She was otherwise happy with the designers work and pointed out it was the Labour party that had steered NZ into the positive economic position where talented designers such as this could flourish.
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April 26, 2008 1:11pm
cc_vince

“NZ First….at heart we’re old and right now noone has any idea where we’re going”

All in all it represents MPs well, older ideas, interesting direction changes and a showing spare tire
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April 26, 2008 2:19pm
Paul

“I don’t care who’s farkin car it is, which way the wheels are facing or, what damn colour it is either. Just give me a friggin tax cut (and NOW!)or, I’ll take take myself, skills and business, and park it in Oz.”

Ah, the me me me generation – how’s about p*** off to oz and do us all a favour.

Hmmm, isn’t it a quite radical (well for timid aussie blue bloods that is) left labour govt that’s just come into power over there?
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April 26, 2008 10:33pm
Peak Oil Conspiracy

Paul:

If you mean “radical” as in delivering tax cuts – then yes that’s Aussie Labor. If you mean “radical” as in not delivering tax cuts – then yes that’s NZ Labour. And speaking of Aussie Labor, Paul, what do you think about the “razor gang” approach to budget spending that they’re expected to deliver this year – yes that’s right. REDUCED GOVERNMENT SPENDING. What was your point exactly?
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April 26, 2008 10:48pm
Peak Oil Conspiracy

Oh and Paul:

A quick bit of research (PhillipJohn/Roger Nome will be relieved to know this didn’t take long – as he hates anyone spending time bringing up historical comments).

Last year, on this thread, you disagreed with the proposition that “The Kevin Rudd Labor Party is much closer to the John Key National party than Helen’s Labour”. Your rebuttal was unconvincing. A better analysis, which I drew to DPF’s attention, is this thoughtful article by James Allan. Key quote:

Then there are the 40,000-odd Kiwis who cross the Tasman each year. While there’s not much any NZ government can do about the lure of a bigger market and more people, the fact is that wages in NZ are low. They’re about $100 a week lower than in Tasmania and considerably lower than in Queensland or Western Australia.

And taxes are relatively high. The OECD estimates that NZ’s general government receipts are running at 45 per cent of GDP. Australia’s run at about 35 per cent. NZ is even above the OECD average, one that includes the high-taxing Europeans. So despite a lower top marginal tax rate there, it is a high-tax economy.

That affects comparative economic growth rates. During the past decade, as a whole NZ has averaged a 3.3 per cent rate, only a tad behind Australia’s 3.4 per cent rate. Not bad at first sight, although during that period Ireland averaged 6 per cent and Singapore 5.8 per cent. The problem is that NZ’s economic and productivity growth rates have been declining in that period, with its Treasury now forecasting annual growth of only 2per cent during the next couple of years. That’s about half of Australia’s expected rate, and at least half what would be needed for a fair number of years to have any hope of getting the Kiwis into the top half of the OECD league tables.

So again Paul, what was your point exactly?
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April 26, 2008 11:09pm
Paul

steady tiger – steady.

You just watch the tide towards left wing politics and policies in that country. And Nob for your fucking sanctimonious information, I used the term ‘radical’ in relation to the previous staid conservative cardigan that enveloped that country.

But this is something that time will only tell.

as for the ‘research’, “Your rebuttal was unconvincing” – says you.

All I did was take the bullet points from the SMH, after all I was in Vancouver and could only go on what I could read online. But we’d hate to forgive one’s opinion based on SMH reporting.

So which of those policies I pointed out are “agenda very similar to my own” according to Key? Go on sunshine have a go.

Tax tax fucking tax, that is the elixir of life isn’t it folks. How much do you want cut? Then in 3 years time when productivity hasn’t increased and wages are relatively low still, do we go in for more tax cuts? How low do you go?

Taxed too much, cry into your bloody wheatbix. So if Labour had cut tax 1,2,3…. years ago, how much of that extra few dollars in your back pocket right here and now would have covered the increasing cost of living????? Well if you are a rich prick plenty easy to cover that cost of living, but if you are an average joe, then sweet bugger all is the answer.

How much is Key going to borrow to give you back money, or which services are for the chop if he does. And how are these tax cuts not going to be inflationary, thus forcing the reserve bank to keep interest rates up, which keep the dollar up, which marginalised NZ manufacturing further, which reduces the internal economy, which keeps us increasingly at the risk of foreign ‘runs’.

So from the ‘sensational’ story on Stuff tonight that 1 in 10 have considered going to OZ “it faces the fallout from rising food, petrol and power prices against a backdrop of increased mortgage rates, a housing slump and high-profile job layoffs blamed on the high Kiwi dollar.”

So rising fuel and food prices are Labours fault – short and only answer is NO.
Increased mortgage rates, as Bollard when he will drop these not the govt.
Housing slump – see above
High profile lay-offs – see above and the high interest rates – high dollar circle.

“So again Paul, what was your point exactly”

Tax cuts aren’t the be all or end all of economic and social nirvana.

final point. 11pm Sat night and you can be bothered taking on a leftie in an arguement and bother going back over old posts – really. FYI I did Inhale (frequently) and have sex with that woman, anything else in my past coming up here?
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April 27, 2008 12:56am
Peak Oil Conspiracy

Paul:

You’ve taken this discussion a long way away from a car caption contest, but you’re begging for a good old-fashioned bitch slap. [Out of respect for DPF and his desire to keep threads on-topic, this will be my last substantive response to you on this subject].

And Nob for your fucking sanctimonious information

Ah Paul – I wear your abuse as a badge of honour. Irrelevant to the debate. And it just belittles you really.

Now back to the issue at hand. Last year I posted a detailed comment on the differences between NZ Labour and Australian Labor – the Kiwiblog archives aren’t the easiest to trawl through, but I know it’s there somewhere. Never mind – this one will do. Here’s two examples of conservative Australian Labor:
(1) substantial tax cuts (deferred above the $180,000 annual income level – yes $180,000, Paul)
(2) Minister with a special focus on deregulation.

As to (1), you might care to know that Australian Labor has committed itself over time, subject to economic conditions, to simplifying the four-tier marginal tax system down to a three-tier one. Fancy that! And Australia has a higher tax-free threshold than New Zealand. Fancy that!

And see this:

But in an apparent pre-emptive warning to the Left of his own party and others calling for more progressive reform, [Wayne Swan, Treasurer] said people needed to understand that tax cuts, along with new increased childcare rebates, were designed to encourage as many as 100,000 people to rejoin or enter the workforce.
…
“We are going to meet every dollar of our tax-cuts commitment because 70 per cent of them are going to low-income earners who are under financial pressure,” Mr Swan said. “But they also have a very important economic function — lifting labour supply in an environment where we are having endemic skill shortages. I cannot talk to a business in this country that is not talking about labour-supply or skills-shortage problems.”

During the election campaign, Labor adopted the bulk of the Coalition’s tax plan but deferred $2.9 billion of cuts for higher-income earners to fund its promise to subsidise computers for school students and reduce elective surgery waiting lists.

Under the proposed cuts, by 2010 the 15 per cent tax rate will apply to incomes of up to $37,000, the 40 per cent tax rate will be cut to 37 per cent and the 45 per cent rate will be cut to 42per cent. Labor’s goal is to have just three tax rates, not four, by 2013-14 — 15 per cent, 30 per cent and 40 per cent.
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April 27, 2008 3:48am
Peak Oil Conspiracy

Oh, but as you say, it’s not all about tax cuts.

So moving right along… as to (2), you might care to read this press release from Lindsay Tanner (Minister for Finance and Deregulation) and Craig Emerson (Minister Assisting the Finance Minister on Deregulation) dated 31 January 2008:

Finance and Deregulation Minister Lindsay Tanner today announced an initial round of new savings measures, a move designed to lead the fight against inflation.

The savings will result in a $643 million reduction in government spending over the next four years including $243 million in 2007-08.
…
These $643 million savings are an initial and modest down-payment on those that will be announced on Budget night.

Still not convinced? Let’s see. (3) Australian Labor campaigned strongly on tax cuts as part of its “economic conservatism” tag-line. What else? (4) Australian Labor took a veryanti-green position on the Tasmanian pulp mill issue – can you imagine New Zealand Labor being so enthusiastic about a similar project? No? And never mind the Big Apology. What about (5) Australian Labor’s support for the aboriginal intervention strategy – the policy introduced under John Howard’s watch? Can you imagine New Zealand Labour taking the same approach with Maori and Pacific Island households, which, regretably, statistically display the same underlying problems? Hardly. It’s almost become PC not to talk about it in New Zealand.

I stand by my position that Australian Labor is poles apart from NZ Labour. Yes there are elements of socialism in Australian Labor, which is to be expected. But show me where NZ Labour has committed itself to (a) significant tax cuts and (b) substantially reduced government spending – let alone the other matters I’ve highlighted. What committed socialists like you, Paul, fail to understand is that it’s about quality government spending and political accountability for results (or non-results) achieved.

And then this:

All I did was take the bullet points from the SMH, after all I was in Vancouver and could only go on what I could read online. But we’d hate to forgive one’s opinion based on SMH reporting.

You don’t say. Just a small thank you for providing you with a worthwhile information service. No? Ungrateful socialist bastard 🙂

final point. 11pm Sat night and you can be bothered taking on a leftie in an arguement and bother going back over old posts

Oh goodness – so it’s a bad thing for a rightie taking on a leftie in an argument? Whatever has the world come to? Any thoughts on that Paul? I have a sharp memory. It serves me well in my professional life. And seeing as you raised “old posts”, here’s one more old post for good time’s sake: on this thread you were exposed as a liar.

I suggest in future, Paul, you don’t rebuke me so lightly. You’ll only end up embarrassing yourself again. And please do lay off the abusive rhetoric, won’t you. I’ll repay you with the same courtesy.
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April 27, 2008 3:48am
Inventory2

Paul said “All I did was take the bullet points from the SMH, after all I was in Vancouver and could only go on what I could read online. But we’d hate to forgive one’s opinion based on SMH reporting.”

Vancouver eh? Yet you defend a government that is sitting idle while thousands flee New Zealand – a defence mounted from afar – hmmmmmm……..
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April 27, 2008 7:16am
labrator

Increased mortgage rates, as[k] Bollard when he will drop these not the govt.

And who writes the tune that Bollard plays his fiddle too? The government. The Reserve Bank Act has been a glorious failure and after 9 years of Labour nothing has changed. Reminds me of your statement “something that time will only tell”. Even when Bollard drops the rates (which I think will be a long way away), the banks aren’t going to drop mortgage rates. They’ve been competing for thin profit margins for too long and it’s time to recoup costs and cover derrieres. And please don’t reel out random figures about how many millions X bank made, no one ever talks about the percentage profit to asset value/capital, they take big emotive figures and tell you big business is screwing us which is very often untrue.

Also, to any one who says if you don’t like it go to Australia; How dare you?! And I couldn’t mean that any more vehemently. A lot of people have died for the democracy that you have the pleasure of living in.
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April 27, 2008 1:41pm
RRM

I can only take heart from the fact that it has 1970s Merc mag wheels… hopefully not too many lovely 1930s Mercedes cars were destroyed to build that abomination.

(Oh, and a token ‘I hate liarbore too!” as on Kiwiblog even a modified Mercedes Benz is s symbol of our distaste for the socialist oppressor…)
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April 27, 2008 5:25pm

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Two terrible attacks in Australia 19 April 2024
No excuse for fleeing 18 April 2024
This could explain the brickbat 18 April 2024
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We still have an inflation problem 18 April 2024
UK Labour Deputy Leader in trouble 17 April 2024
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Again, hate crimes are not necessarily terrorism.
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Tougher than that
Croaking Cassandra
ABs stripped of 2011 title after try disallowed
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Liam Hehir
Why I am retiring from political blogging
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Angie Warren-Clark: Meet the Newbies
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