China Caption Contest
Whale Oil has started a caption contest, so I am extending it here. You can submit here or there. As usual, entries should be funny, not nasty. Photo is from NZ Herald.
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Tags: caption contest, China, free trade agreement, Humour
April 8th, 2008 at 9:50 am
After the signing China’s Premier, Wen Jiabao, challenged New Zealand Prime Minister, Helen Clark, to a game of one-on-one invisible mime-ball, winner take all.
April 8th, 2008 at 9:58 am
Oh yes – Winston – short chap – I think we could find a place for him!
April 8th, 2008 at 10:01 am
“After you’ve run them over with a tank you can stack 100 of them into a pile only this tall”
April 8th, 2008 at 10:02 am
interesting………..
Helen looks decidedly uncomfortable, while the two chinese seem to be very happy with the situation…..
1. “The pile of paper the officals bought to me was this high – which was just too much – so I had them shot”
2. “Our election finance act is about this big”
3. “I use average sized ones – theyre about this long”
4. “I have a chair in my office for officials – its this high. You should get one Mrs davis”
April 8th, 2008 at 10:02 am
“…And get this… the little guy’s name was ‘Won Well-Hung’ which in English means ‘Tripod’!”…..
April 8th, 2008 at 10:04 am
After signing the FTA, Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao treated officials to an impromptu display of the ancient Chinese martial art of ‘Zhongnanai’, literally the ‘way-of-the-shuffling-paper’
April 8th, 2008 at 10:12 am
Helen: “That really is amazing. You’ve made Winston invisible!”
April 8th, 2008 at 10:17 am
“…and by 2030, the amount of say your people have in their affairs will fit in a box this size.”
April 8th, 2008 at 10:21 am
I reckon the competition should be expanded to cover this image too:
http://media.apn.co.nz/webcontent/image/jpg/nobluecar.jpg
April 8th, 2008 at 10:28 am
Don’t get too big for your boots, Ms Clarke. In power terms, we’re up here, and you’re down there. Now smile for the cameras.
April 8th, 2008 at 10:30 am
When I say “jump” Comrade Clark, I expect it to be at least this high.
April 8th, 2008 at 10:32 am
…and then we will crush your country like this.
April 8th, 2008 at 10:36 am
“and YOUR economy is THIS big…”
April 8th, 2008 at 10:40 am
..and please tell your husband that the toilet cubicles are only this big.
[DPF: And that's 10 demerits.]
April 8th, 2008 at 10:43 am
I once caught a Prime Minister this big.
April 8th, 2008 at 10:52 am
Sorry for being nasty here, but:
This is how high the pile of corpses of dead Tibetan and pro-democrcy protesters we killed yesterday was. Now lets talk about trade.
April 8th, 2008 at 11:05 am
“NZ Prime Minister visits Communist China How To Clap like Chaiman Mao Class”
April 8th, 2008 at 11:09 am
We admired your Electoral Finance Act Helen. We’ve added a few bits here and there. Any breaches, and our opponents will be able to fit in a box this tall.
April 8th, 2008 at 11:24 am
“that is nothing Prime Minister, my pledge card is this big”
April 8th, 2008 at 11:31 am
“oh yes, I love poodles too – about this big”
April 8th, 2008 at 11:31 am
For lunch, we will be feasting on a whale steak this thick!
April 8th, 2008 at 11:42 am
“our ‘footprint’ is only this big”
April 8th, 2008 at 11:44 am
“once you catch the flea, clap your hands like this, no more problems”
April 8th, 2008 at 11:51 am
No, seriously, Ms Clark, we’d only want you to take care of THIS much nuclear waste from our reactors every year once you’ve changed the legislation for us………
April 8th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
“Once you’ve harvested their organs they fit into a box this big. Very efficient”
April 8th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
I once read a rant in the comments on Kiwiblog that must have been THIS long…
April 8th, 2008 at 12:46 pm
Actually, size does count, but you wouldnt know much about that would you ?
April 8th, 2008 at 1:06 pm
I noticed the TV news presenters in your country almost never wear ties. Don’t they know how? You always start with about THIS much left at the other end…
April 8th, 2008 at 1:12 pm
Helen – “No I havent seen it! I just know, okay? Winston is exaggerating!”
April 8th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
As a measure of our appreciation we have decided to present your foreign miminister with baubles this big.
April 8th, 2008 at 2:14 pm
“We plan to issue face masks This thick, to protect every athlete competing in our Glorious Games. If they’re Tibetan, that would be Body Armour.”
April 8th, 2008 at 5:46 pm
And this, “David Farrar”… he this tall you say?
April 8th, 2008 at 6:06 pm
We can compress 9000 Tibetan Monks into a pile like this Miss Klark.
April 8th, 2008 at 6:53 pm
You’ve got about this much chance of us supporting your candidacy for the UN role, now of you go back to Wellington……
April 8th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
lab rat and muzzas’ efforts are the only ones of any merit/humour..
phil(whoar.co.nz)
and i dunno about anyone else..but i have this image i can’t shake..
of clark arriving back at the airport..waving the deal above her head..
and pronouncing..
“..trade in our times..”
April 8th, 2008 at 11:52 pm
“Well, Prime Minister, we estimate your credibility gap is about this big”.
April 9th, 2008 at 12:08 am
1. The other version of the Treaty is the one in Mandarin (it’s about this high). As we both know, it’s virtually traditional to have a Treaty founding a relationship between two peoples, in two different languages. This so that the larger party later gets to screw the other one over big time – like we do in Tibet and you do for now in Aotearoa.
2. So my secretary was carrying our copy of the agreement (“it was about this high”) into my office when my great-nephew Wang Hi put his leg out and when she tripped she threw it out the window. So I decided to show the great nephew how important the agreement is to China by resorting to the manner of a physical labouring peasant. Are you prepared do the same to Winston?
April 9th, 2008 at 12:26 am
Hai…ya!
April 9th, 2008 at 1:24 am
“No, I am not lying. It was a very big bottle of Cognac. This Big! Very expensive! Have you seen it?”
“Winston!!!!”
April 9th, 2008 at 1:37 am
“Did you see the Olympic torch? It is about so big. Bet the bloody Tibetans stole it again!”
April 9th, 2008 at 1:51 am
“Believe me Helen, I have known the Dalai Lama since he was a baby. I remember the day I smacked his bottom. Talk about a little whiner! And he was only this big then. “
April 9th, 2008 at 9:26 am
“I grabbed the ball like this, and gave it an almighty thump – sent it clear into touch down toward their 22… Helen – you following?”
April 9th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
“By the time we have finished, USA will be this big.”
April 9th, 2008 at 2:30 pm
We changed to hanging them for a while…. the drop had to be measured pretty precisely otherwise their heads came off… so we just went back to bullets. Easier all round.
April 9th, 2008 at 2:40 pm
“I wish,” said Helen Davis when Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao asked whether rumours were true about New Zealand men.
April 9th, 2008 at 2:43 pm
Would you like your plastic fun men this long Miss Klark?
April 9th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
Prime Minister Clark assured Wen Jiabao that New Zealand women also definitely had much to offer undr the FTA.
April 9th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
“Helen have you seen the Olympic torch? It is about so big. Hehe, I bet those little Tibetan buggers stole it again!”
April 9th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
We had to design special anti protest tanks as the standard military tanks had about this much ground clearance which allowed a few violent protestors to survive by lying flat on the ground. We checked last time we visited and the new ones will work well in Wellington.
April 10th, 2008 at 8:46 am
“I agree Premier, Winnie-Fu does talk a lot of cock,” Helen Kwok, Prime Minister of China’s new Pacific micro-dependency, New Zealand, told Wen Jiabao yesterday. – Hooters News Agency.