Daft’s EFA Amendment
The DAFT Party has agreed with Peter Dunne that the Electoral Finance Act needs amending, and they have proposed the above formula to simplify it in relation to party spending limits.
The formula may look complicated but it would mean there is greater certainty than with the current EFA!
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Tags: DAFT Party, Electoral Finance Act
April 17th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
I’m not sure that we agree with Peter Dunne, or disagree with him really, which I am sure is pretty much the same way he feels about himself.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:06 pm
First we have people running round the North Island bush in fatigues, adopting the priciples of Al Quaeda. Now we have a political party advancing the evil agenda of the much more dangerous Al Gebra, which we all know is linked to 9/11 (not to mention a host of other fractions).
This group indoctrinates its followers in special schools (pesantren, which translates roughly as “peasant schools” or, in NZ, “public schools”) where they are made to mindlessly recite the principles Al Gebra for much of the day.
Top secret intelligence suggests the only things that’s prevented these schools from flourishing in NZ is that, unlike those in Muslim countries, they’re been completely unable to find 70 virgins – doe-eyed or otherwise – amongst the student body.
The eventual aim of Al Gebra remains murky, though turning potential liberal Arts students into slack-jawed dull witted Engineering students is thought to be part of the plot.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:11 pm
As a liberal art student I look at the above equation, my eyes glaze over and my pants reach 100% humidity. I think I suffer from dyscalculia.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:13 pm
Rex, remember Weapons of Math Instruction.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:23 pm
Um,
This can be simplified further. You will find that it reduces following expansion of the 4th polynomial and making the Markorf approximation to 2nd order substituting the common factor (x+1)^2 multiplied by the LHS of A1 into the RHS and the resulting equation shows
F(r) = F(r) this thereby shows that equality should be a strong basis for further electoral funding and that the injection of large amounts of secret money (2nd term A6) should be restricted.
Unfortunately I don’t understand how a function dependent on one variable r can take into account the following factors
”
* The weather and moon cycles
* How many Google hits the party’s home page receives
* The number of vowels in all the members names
* What the members of PENIS had for breakfast
”
Or am I misunderstanding the meaning of the formula and \rho is proportion of seats in parliament, F is the amount of Force that a parties legislative agenda carries and r is the amount of secret trust fund money spent outside of the 3 months before an election…
April 17th, 2008 at 7:31 pm
Tuatara:
“Unfortunately I don’t understand how a function dependent on one variable r can take into account the following factors”
Obviously you are a stranger to Quantum Mechanics.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:32 pm
tuatara – this was the first page of the calculation…
April 17th, 2008 at 7:32 pm
Where does Winston Peters get factored in?
April 17th, 2008 at 7:34 pm
Winston Peters is on page 37ish. For a full copy of the equation please send your name, address, and credit card details to our email.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:35 pm
All this to determine who gets the biggest piece of the pi?
April 17th, 2008 at 7:37 pm
slightlyrighty, it may seem simple to you. But most people are confused by the EFA, the PEA is just a way of making it simpler.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:38 pm
huh! he said ‘PENIS’….
April 17th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
No wonder that possum on Dunne’s head looks confused.
My head hurts Peter.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
Lee C – Party Expenditure National Inquiry Service = PENIS. PENIS distributes the Saving Together Deposit – STD – to all parties.
Sounds kinda like high school all over again.
April 17th, 2008 at 7:47 pm
Has the possum got a “STD”?
April 17th, 2008 at 7:57 pm
re line A(9) I think the corrected expression is 990 r to the 4th power ?
April 17th, 2008 at 8:11 pm
Some more maths to help?
April 17th, 2008 at 8:15 pm
Ross – That would work as a skit on Cullen explaining his tax-cuts formulae.
April 17th, 2008 at 8:28 pm
Or a skit on Michael Mann explaining his obfuscated/disingenuous global warming graphs.
April 17th, 2008 at 8:33 pm
I have a serious question DAFT.
What would stop the accummulated quantity of STD interfering with and corrupting the PENIS thus preventing it from a proper performance in accordance with the PEA?
This is a worry.
April 17th, 2008 at 8:35 pm
Can the STD PENIS be cured by PEA?
April 17th, 2008 at 8:50 pm
Well D4J that’s one of my worries. As I read the equation the PEA is one of the essential functions of the PENIS (although I imagine there may be others unmentioned), and if there’s a sudden influx of STD as represented at the beginning by F(r) – which I assume stands for Function [I mean, who wants to fuck an (r) - that'd be just nuts]; then who knows what may happen? The whole PENIS may collapse.
It’s all there in the equation, and I hope I’m wrong, very wrong indeed.
April 17th, 2008 at 8:52 pm
this is all good and the algorithm indeed fantastic. one thing tho…just one small thing in getting it through.
we’ll have to crack the clark-inchy code. that is how on earth are we going to break this phrase in order to move forward and get this through???
here ya go: C-O-R-R-U-P-T
April 17th, 2008 at 8:54 pm
DAFT are you trying to suggest that there is a superposition of
”
* The weather and moon cycles
* How many Google hits the party’s home page receives
* The number of vowels in all the members names
* What the members of PENIS had for breakfast
”
?
I would contend that the macroscopic size of the breakfast would collapse this.
April 17th, 2008 at 8:58 pm
I think I decoded it –
F(r) and F(p)* is the probability it is illegal and R is the dollar amount
F(r) is the function for all parties other than labor to figure out how much they can spend
and F(p) is the formula for labour (as long as they launder the money via a government institution)
*FYI F(r) appears to tend toward 0 and p(r) tends toward 1 (in a wavey sort of way) for numbers greater than a few cents.
April 17th, 2008 at 8:58 pm
DUH.
E=MC squared.
For every action there is a reaction
April 17th, 2008 at 9:14 pm
Doesn’t Parekura getting to the Pi first kind of bugger that theory? Or does having a bmi with its own gravitational force cause all that money to come and take a “rest” in Labour’s bank account due to him having eaten all the Pi’s?
April 17th, 2008 at 9:17 pm
So how does the theory of relativity and Newton’s Third Law relate to the STD PENIS PEA issue Steve?
Sorry, I’m just very concerned about it, that’s all. I think it’s important we all understand.
April 17th, 2008 at 9:22 pm
Albert Einstein said if you divide the Parekura pie man by one million you with get a PEA sized STD PENIS.
April 17th, 2008 at 9:29 pm
By George, D4J and RP, you may have it. Hmmmm. So factor in PPM with PEA, who as a black hole gobbles up the STD, and you save the PENIS, which is then free to exorcise its PEA to the lucky voters. You’re amazing. This is what genuis is about. Thank you, thank you. I am SAVED. The world must never know.
April 17th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
What happens when a Variable Algebraic Giant Indicative Normalizable Axis is put into the mix with the PENIS?
April 17th, 2008 at 9:37 pm
Sorry I can’t answer that question buggerlugs, as I’ve just sat on my compass and my cat is eating my abacus. Must go.
April 17th, 2008 at 10:07 pm
Sorry I went to get beer! All questions answered on the DAFT blog, which is where you should all be commenting anyway!
April 17th, 2008 at 10:32 pm
There is a serious error in the formula. Since the whole thing is imaginary, then surely it should contain sqrt(-1) somewhere.
April 17th, 2008 at 11:19 pm
Imaginary…. pfffft shows what you know.
April 18th, 2008 at 7:19 am
peterwn –
maybe you missed the second part of p(r) -> throw in a large negative number as r and labour gets to spend a lot of imaginary money in exchange for $1 of real money.
Must be the social credit loophole.
April 18th, 2008 at 11:29 am
Wrong again GNZ. No one party gets any more of the STD than PENIS will give them, as figured out thru the algebraic formula. Neither Labour, National, or a DAFT Party party, set to stand anymore than their random allocation. Although there is a test run with imaginary money before the legislation goes into place. We called it DAFTopoly, if you wish to purchase a copy please meet me at 3:30 this afternoon outside the statue of King Dick on Parliament lawn. Bring only unmarked coins.
April 18th, 2008 at 11:52 am
Please may I be excused Miss, as I didn’t appear to have a penis last time I looked? Thank you. Whew..
April 18th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
I don’t get the bit between F and .
April 19th, 2008 at 2:32 am
Mara: Just because you don’t have a penis does not make you any less of a person. What the EFA does need is a PENIS type organ to administer STD’s. WHich is why, if you had taken the time to actually look at our blog post and comprehend, we need to scrap the EFA and legislate the PEA.
Side show: So you did get A13?
Once again. If you have comments about DAFT matters, comment on the DAFT site. It would be nice to get some comments for a change…