Hilarious
The President of Paraguay has admitted that he is the father of a child conceived while he was still a Catholic bishop.
Whoops.
But it gets better.
This is the mother, aged 26. But the relationship has been going on for a decde – since she was 16!
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Tags: Fun Things
April 15th, 2009 at 9:14 am
Isn’t 16 a little too old for a catholic priest?
April 15th, 2009 at 9:17 am
Maybe he was just administering extreme unction?
April 15th, 2009 at 9:32 am
im just surprised he was dating a chick…
April 15th, 2009 at 9:33 am
did she sing in the choir?
April 15th, 2009 at 9:39 am
Catholic church in underage sex scandle. Well theres a shock.
At least it was a girl for once. Thats the suprise part for us all.
Must really piss off the honest Catholics.
April 15th, 2009 at 9:44 am
Heh, it puts me in mind of Bishop Eamonn Casey, the disgraced bishop of Galway. When it emerged that he had a son in America, he fled the country and wound up in the Phillippines, where he sought absolution from the local cardinal, Jaime Lachica Sin; this of course gave rise to the great first line of confession: “Bless me Sin for I have fathered…”
April 15th, 2009 at 9:46 am
She must have been dressed up as an Alter Boy at the time!
April 15th, 2009 at 9:51 am
honest Catholics.
Ha.
April 15th, 2009 at 10:00 am
Odd for a catholic priest to go for a girl who’s old enough to not look like a boy…
April 15th, 2009 at 10:29 am
Bishop : “Holy Father, do you think we will ever see women ordained into the priesthood?”
Pope: “Not in our lifetimes my son, but maybe in our childrens”
April 15th, 2009 at 10:29 am
Put it away
She looks like a boy at 26, must have been even more of a resemblance at 16!
April 15th, 2009 at 10:44 am
reminds me back in the 80′s we arrived in Kisangani, Zaire by boat. The captain’s brother was the local priest and was busy getting ready for the upcoming visit by the Pope.
This mostly consisted of getting his wife and 5 kids out of town.
April 15th, 2009 at 10:48 am
Age of consent in Paraguay is 16 – catholic baiters can’t hold catholics to higher moral laws than the liberal ones they so vocally fight for and then condemn them for living by them.
April 15th, 2009 at 10:49 am
In fact, a good liberal would be rejoicing that finally a catholic preist had thrown off his proscriptive oppressive outlook. Be happy liberals! Your god has come!
April 15th, 2009 at 10:50 am
It gets even better DPF, the pope granted an unprecedented waiver to allow the priest to become the president without violating church rules. Isn’t having sex – let alone fathering kids – while a bishop violating church rules?
April 15th, 2009 at 11:03 am
All joking aside, if I remember correctly studies show that the prevalence of pedophilia and homosexuality in the Catholic church is about the same, or a bit lower, than that in the population at large. The incidence isn’t that high as to be noteworthy, the hypocrisy and the cover-ups by the hierarchy are the real scandal.
And I didn’t think she looked like a boy that much dave – those boobs would be the give away. Unless you have a thing for fat boys, some of whom have a pretty amazing set of man boobs….
April 15th, 2009 at 11:06 am
Whats your fucking malfunction Ben?
April 15th, 2009 at 11:24 am
PaulL
Always happy with a 36C, but looking at her she wouldn’t have done much better than 32B at 26, which suggests 30A at 16, not exactly matronly m8!! . . . -_-
April 15th, 2009 at 12:04 pm
The legal age of consent in Paraguay is 14.
April 15th, 2009 at 12:14 pm
Murray (2831) Vote: 0 3 Says:
April 15th, 2009 at 11:06 am
Whats your fucking malfunction Ben?
I don’t think Ben has a problem at all, but anyone who believes catholics are honest, does.
It is the nature of catholicism that its members sin – no sin, no confession. no confession, no absolution. No absolution, no communion. No communion, not part of the church.
Its not that hard to join the dots Muzza.
April 15th, 2009 at 12:34 pm
..not part of the church.. more sinning.
April 15th, 2009 at 1:00 pm
THOU SHALT NOT….
(Thou shalt not do as I do – only do as I say.)
April 15th, 2009 at 1:02 pm
So, MNIJ, what you’re saying is that Catholics are inherently dishonest? And I suppose they don’t wash and their eyes are too close together as well? It’s possible to be honest and also fall into what the RC church refers to as sin.
April 15th, 2009 at 1:11 pm
It’s possible to be honest and also fall into what the RC church refers to as sin.
How?
April 15th, 2009 at 1:39 pm
Well, for a start missing mass is a sin. Having impure thoughts is a sin. Doubting the infallibility of the Pope is a sin. None of which mean the “sinner” is necessarily dishonest.
April 15th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
Why not blog on the sexual peccadilloes on our politicians David – why are their private lives of the adulterers and toilet cruisers in our Public life none of our business and off limits whilst and get we get an orgasmic post about a Paraguayan.
You wouldn’t be wanting to bring the Roman Catholic bashers out from under their rocks now would you?
[DPF: First of all Bishops preach chastity, so finding out one of them was fucking a teenage girl for a decade and having a baby with her, passes the hypocrisy test. Secondly you don't understand the difference between reporting a story already in the media, and reporting deranged gossip that only exists in people's imaginations]
April 15th, 2009 at 2:10 pm
Well, it took a while, but here we go again.
I’m a catholic.
You’re talikng about catholicism and I don’t like it.
I’m being victimised.
Well boo hoo hoo!
Although, I guess I should expect it since the god catholics worship is already the bigest player of the “Look at me, I’m a victim” card.
April 15th, 2009 at 2:55 pm
Another anti-Christian nappy soiling from the left. Everyone who doesn;t worship Marx is to be sneered at eh boys.
Fuck you commie, you’re out for the count.
Didums.
April 15th, 2009 at 2:57 pm
MyNameIsJack (468) Vote: 2 6 Says:
April 15th, 2009 at 12:14 pm
“It is the nature of catholicism that its members sin – no sin, no confession. no confession, no absolution. No absolution, no communion. No communion, not part of the church.”
Bollocks. No sin, no absolution required.
April 15th, 2009 at 3:03 pm
So, Jack it really is just left-footers you despise (and Jews, of course, but that’s by the by). You have no problems at all with Methodists, Anglicans, Presbyterians, Lutherans, Adventists, Witnesses, Brethren or any of the non-Catholic versions of Christianity, just the doolans? I ask out of genuine interest, by the way as sectarianism has always fascinated me, even (or perhaps especially) as an atheist.
April 15th, 2009 at 3:08 pm
I don’t actually despise any of them, but if you ask me, all religious believers are a wafer short of a communion.
Murray, get a grip.
I don’t worship Marx, nor do I worship anything. You, on the other hand, appear top worship a god who has severe mental derangements.
What is easter all about if its not about god saying “boo hoo, mankind is so wicked, but I will forgive them. But if I just forgave them, then I’d feel cheated. I know, I’ll have myself born and then killed in a most horrendous way, and then pretend that my death was about forgiving their sins and then everyone will see how clever I am and will worship me forever. But look, manking is still evil and they hate me, boo hoo hoo”.
April 15th, 2009 at 4:06 pm
There speaks the shrill and intolerant voice of the new class of atheist; one who is not happy to simply live life on its merits, but one who must abuse other people’s beliefs in order to achieve some level of satisfaction. One of the reasons I turned down the road to atheism was that I was sick of being told what to believe by people I had little respect for. Sadly I find all too many atheists are just as judgemental and intolerant of contrary beliefs as the most hidebound Christian craw-thumper.
April 15th, 2009 at 4:54 pm
MNIJ – is there anything useful you’d like to add to the conversation, or are you just here so that you can explain to us all that you don’t like any religious people?
When I was 13 I used to think like that, but somewhere along the way I learned some tolerance. People are religious for their own reasons. Disparaging every religious person because you don’t agree with their beliefs (hint, they’re called beliefs and not facts for a reason), or because you believe that some religious people are hypocritical or intolerant, seems incredibly shallow to me. You are missing the many many deeply religious people who live lives that you and I would be proud to have lived. People who help others, who volunteer of their time and money, who care for those that nobody else does. The Salvation Army are a classic example – have you seen the work that they do to support people who are on the lowest possible rung of society – the addicts, the homeless, people with mental disorders. It is shameful to tar all those people with your narrow minded brush.
If you want to be part of an adult discussion, I suggest you start acting like an adult. If you want to be treated like a child, then keep acting like one.
April 15th, 2009 at 6:24 pm
Look out Jack, before long they’ll be saying you are insulting their “deeply held beliefs”, or even worse, their “cherished beliefs”.
Paul, there are a great many people doing a great many things, because they want to and because they think it is the right thing to do, and none of them are being whipped into line by threat of eternal damnation or promise of future rewards. In fact it is these promises that lead to things like witch hunts and flying aeroplanes in to buildings.
Sure, the Sallies do good work, but they’re not the only ones who care for their fellow man.
April 15th, 2009 at 6:33 pm
PaulL – thank you for that post.
April 15th, 2009 at 6:36 pm
MNIJ – you give us atheists a bad name.
April 15th, 2009 at 6:44 pm
straya, I would have thought that atheists already had a bad name amongst believers. After all, god wants the faithful to kill the non believers in so many of the “holy” books.
Have you ever considered that if there were no believers there would be no atheists? One can only be defined as an atheist by reference to religion. Have you ever considered that lack of belief in gods, or faith, is the default setting at birth? Why are the religious so keen for their children to be educated in their religion as young as possible? Because they need to innoculate their children against knowledge and reason while they are malleable.
Santa, the easter bunny, thre tooth fairy and god – all myths, every last one of them.
April 15th, 2009 at 6:52 pm
borker, do you get off on making such a dick of yourself in public? You must do. Just look at the evidence on display.
FWIW I’m a Christian and my business partner is an avowed atheist. We work really well together, we trust each other implicitly, we’re great friends and respect each others’ beliefs. We met 5 years ago.
If you really believe that anyone with a faith is set on killing everyone else then you’d rate as one of the most unhinged people I’ve ‘met’.
April 15th, 2009 at 6:52 pm
BB, you’re preaching to the (non-church) choir.
I just think that there are plenty of powerful, rational arguments to advance against the existence of a supreme being, without the need to descend to personally denigrating those whose beliefs I don’t ascribe to.
April 15th, 2009 at 7:22 pm
Billy, I’m not saying that there aren’t many people who aren’t religious who also do great things. Just that some (even many) religious folks do too. My problem with MNIJ is that he is damning everyone in a group for the actions of a few. That is incredibly poor manners, poor argument style, and just flat out inaccurate. It has no value to anyone to do that, so he is wasting all our time. He is basically just trolling.
If he is here to troll, then OK, he’s achieving what he came here for. If he’s here to have some sort of debate, then he could start by acknowledging that those things he is claiming as absolutes are actually gross generalisations. We could all have a discussion about how some religious folks are hypocrites – as DPF has done. But to then follow that into all religious folks being hypocrites is just stupid. It then results in offending a whole bunch of people and a flame war. And wastes electrons, thereby causing global warming. Or something like that.
April 15th, 2009 at 8:39 pm
Bearhunter at 9.44 a.m.
One of the funniest pieces I have seen on the net.
The growth of Atheism has meant that several of the jokes I told last weekend went over peoples’ heads. A pity.
April 15th, 2009 at 8:55 pm
I must point out that the Bishop in question is no longer in communion with the Catholic Church. He was Excommunicated by Pope Benedict for holding public office at the same time as being a Bishop.
April 15th, 2009 at 9:18 pm
Ah well. So long as the Pope understands the things that the church should really care about.
April 15th, 2009 at 9:27 pm
The mission of the Chruch is the salvation of souls. Christ didnt come down to establish the Holy Welfare State. As an aside one can point their finger all they like at the Catholic Church and say things like ” they should be helping the poor” In the same way that Judas frowned at Mary for wasting expensive oil on Christ.
Such comments miss the mark as a consequence of peoples faith has meant that alot of charities have arisen. The modern concept of Charity was devolped by the Catholic Church in the form of the benedictine monks. Plus one can give the whole litany of the Saints as an example of people who as a by product of their faith have devoted their time to Charity. Mother Teresa being a modern day example and off course in my own city Mother Alburt
April 15th, 2009 at 11:19 pm
Oh the poor old catholics, it really isn’t fair all the stick they get cause in my expert christian opinion every denomination is as bad as each other.
While I have a reasonably strong faith in “standard” christian doctrine I don’t have very much faith in the “standard” christian leader. Thats the trouble with modern christianity, lack of persecution breeds waffley arogant preachers, in it for the money, or more often, the power and control they can get over people (including 16 year old girls).
So do us a favour, persecute your local church so the current leadership can be purged out of the system, and if there is any truth to this God bothering business (as my old man puts it) it will emerge in due course.
April 16th, 2009 at 3:01 am
billyborker says April 15th, 2009 at 6:44 pm:
Don’t you denigrate Santa or you might just get an unexpected visit from the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny just might hid his Easter eggs up your “Chocolate valley of eternal darkness”.
April 16th, 2009 at 1:33 pm
16 year olds can be dirty girls too. She ain’t no angel.
Mistakes are made, he’s a hypocrite, what do you do? Suffer some deserved public shit then get on with life again, preferably not as a priest though.
Crikey, any hint of religion and the haters like billybitter come crawling out. Bitterness is not a good look billy.