Whale accepts Mallard’s challenge
May 28th, 2011 at 4:49 pm by David FarrarWhale Oil blogs:
Trevor Mallard has issued a challenge. As is usual for the cripple he has picked the one sport he is good at it (if you can all it a sport) and he has also picked on the wrong person for a challenge.
So Trevor, I accept your challenge
Excellent, and this will give Trevor a real incentive to get back in shape.
Firstly, I need a bike, not just any bike the same bike you use. We have to race using exactly the same equipment. It is only fair. The only difference will be the riders. A Cripple vs a Whale.
Secondly, the race will be on August 15 and I pick 60kms for the distance, if you are going to go, go big.
I suspect there will be a large media contingent following the race.
Thirdly, since you picked a sport that you excel at, it is only fair that there be a counter-challenge and I choose boxing. You mentioned your “fear” of my excessive bulk. I currently weigh 105kg. You stated in the comments on Red Alert that if I got training then I would lose 30kg and you’re are probably right, therefore there should be no reason other than your cowardice for rejecting a boxing match 8 weeks after our cycle race.
I understand that the boxing match will be pay per view, and that all proceeds from the match would go towards helping the recovery in Christchurch.
Tags: Cameron Slater, Trevor Mallard, Whale Oil
May 28th, 2011 at 5:05 pm
Interesting to watch, I don’t think The Duck has the nuts to man up on this one, all mouth and trousers.
Vote:Standing toe to toe against The Whale there would be a pretty fair chance he will get the shit knocked out of him in short order, which I’m sure most of the country would love to see.
Mind you the soft cock is probably likely to claim he can’t be touched as parlimentary privilege applies, go Whale give the whimp the bash, he’s earned it.
May 28th, 2011 at 5:12 pm
Eat your heart out SBW.
THIS will be the match of the century.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 5:18 pm
Not to be. The gutless slimy little turd has chickened out on the boxing match citing injury.
http://whaleoil.gotcha.co.nz/index.php/2011/05/i-accept/#comment-45637
What a wanker!
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 5:19 pm
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May 28th, 2011 at 5:40 pm
I think the compromise offered on shooting is reasonable. If Trevor has an existing neck condition and I have no reason to doubt him, this is the obvious way to go.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 5:44 pm
The only thing wrong with the gutless little pricks neck is that it hasn’t been stretched enough yet.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 5:48 pm
This all started because Whale called Trevor a cripple. I think cycling is a legitimate way for one to demonstrate that they aren’t crippled, whether Trevor is good at it or not.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 5:56 pm
Just put this up at ele’s place:-
The bloody wuss Mallard has ducked out, citing various medical conditions which somehow didn’t stop him mixing it up with Tau Henare.
This is the ultimate epic FAIL for Labour.
Their ‘campaign manager’ has managed to turn himself into a National laughing stock. Hell he couldn’t manage a decent crap during a sewerage farm visit.
Can you imagine John Key’s response to Trev The Wuss’s next question in the house?
‘shakes head in disbelief at such crass stupidity’
It’s no wonder Clare Curren is walking away from all this rot. She goes up in my estimation.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 5:59 pm
Many people who cycle end up as cripples Shazza.
I blame the motorists myself.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:12 pm
you wanna drop down to 75kg?? make sure you do it properly – maintain as much lean mass as you can.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:13 pm
wow .. a clucking duck
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:18 pm
“Go Whale!!” is all I can say!
Come on Trev, man up!
Excellent. Something to look forward to this year!
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:18 pm
fuck me .. Daffy is now accusing David of dodgy polling .. what do you say Cactus?
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:27 pm
and yes .. daffy has chickened out .. these are mallards words about the whale “I bet he is too chicken, and if he accepted he wouldn’t have a chance”. hahahaha
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:29 pm
Someone should dub Whaleoil’s 5.19pm blog to my favorite youtube clip.
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May 28th, 2011 at 6:32 pm
@Johnboy. You are a fool. You are a John Minto of the right. A challenge was issued and accepted with conditions. The conditions could not be met so a counter proposal was made. So far this challenge has been reasonable. Slater has time to get confident on a bike and Mallard has time to figure out how to shoot. I hope this happens.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:35 pm
Someone is telling porkies:
From Gotcha (today): Trevor says:”No big secret that I had a spinal (neck) injury playing rugby about a decade ago which has left me with pretty severe cord compression and highly elevated risk levels. No contact sports of public variety.
Hold that thought.
From Scoop (10 September 2007): http://www.scoop.co.nz/stories/HL0709/S00174.htm
The article quotes: “Mr O’Connor [Damien O'Connor] is a hugely enthusiastic member of the parliamentary rugby team – a team that has included such legendary rugby players as Trevor Mallard, John Tamihere and John Carter.
Now both statements can’t be true, so my question is: Is Trevor telling porkies? Surely he can’t say he suffered a neck injury a decade ago and as a result he can’t participate in contact sports, only to then play rugby for the parliamentary team??
Or has he bloused out because he’s running scared of the Whale?
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:41 pm
Elaycee
And he had no trouble laying one on Tau in Parliament buildings – mind you that was more than likely a blindsider but still people I know with spinal injuries generally try and avoid the fisticuffs.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:45 pm
@ Pauleastbay
Yup – a king hit. A real nice touch. The coven didn’t want charges laid but in stepped Joe Public and a complaint was laid that simply could not be ignored. Now Mallard has a conviction for his trouble. And yet this thug still wants to lead the country…
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 6:50 pm
http://asianinvasion2006.blogspot.com/2011/05/duck-v-whale-grand-on-it.html
Come on stick a grand on it DPF.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 7:15 pm
damn, id sponser 2x helmet cams.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 7:34 pm
@ Elaycee, I have no idea about the rules of the parliamentary rugby team and playing rules, but it is probably played under limited contact rules ie. No pressure in the scrum etc. I am not running an apologise here for Mallard but I see no inconsistency from him to date. Failure to match Slater with a shotgun well then Slater wins.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 7:53 pm
IHS. You are a pathetic little apologist for a piece of crap whose bluff has been called and who has been found utterly wanting as we have always suspected.
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 8:09 pm
Is the shooting contest at each other?
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 8:49 pm
@IHS: I’ve only seen one game involving the Parliamentary rugby team (a curtain raiser somewhere) and there was no shortage of contact on that occasion!
Seems odd that a Scoop piece dated September 2007 would refer to Mallard as having played for the Parliamentary team if he had suffered an injury circa 2001. Only explanation (unless Trevor is telling porkies) is that the injury occurred prior to 2001.
Who knows?
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 8:49 pm
If Mallard is scared of fisticuffs, he must be petrified of Large Bore Target Shooting………..
Vote:May 28th, 2011 at 9:02 pm
It’s a long time since I’ve shot a large bore.
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 12:43 am
@Johnboy. I apologise for nobody. You remain a fool.
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 1:13 am
@Elayce, You have the advantage of having been at at a match. I have watched a scrum on TV and it looked to me that no pressure was applied. That makes a lot of sense. Rugby is very different to boxing . At the end of the day you are correct Who Knows ? I hope Mallard and Slater can come up with terms that work. For the record I will back Slater to to win. Oh and there is no way I would get into a boxing mach with a him. My gamble is that Slater can get close to Mallard on a bike but Mallard can’t upskill on the gun.
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 4:25 am
Jesus…First Pacquiao vs Mayweather falls through, now the Boxing world misses out on this ‘Fight of the Century’ as well!
Vote:As much as I detest Mallard- I’m struggling to figure out why ‘The Whale’ was being spoken of as such a tough character…has he boxed before?? I’ve seen him post a few gloating pictures of shooting a few cats (which doesn’t exactly scream ‘badass’ to me…) Seems unless you are a flea-ridden toothless old moggy you shouldn’t have too much to worry about….
May 29th, 2011 at 7:40 am
For once I’m backing Trev.
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 8:29 am
Whale might be too busy helping David to have the time to challenge Trev.
http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/politics/5069779/Anti-MMP-plan-leaked
IHS. You are perfectly entitled to hold whatever opinion you wish of my sanity even if you are irrelevant.
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 8:32 am
I don’t understand why he’s even thinking of doing this. Why would you even contemplate giving Mallard any oxygen in the media? Whale has been outmanoeuvered on this one. Mallard winds up a winner either way.
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 9:19 am
thedavincimode says (9.17am): “Mallard winds up a winner either way.”
If Mallard steps into a ring with Whale and Whale sits him on his arse, the only way that Mallard could be deemed to be a winner is if he copied the Penny Bright version of ‘success’ – in Mallard’s case he would merely be the first loser.
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 9:23 am
If Mallard has a long standing spinal injury then what the hell is he doing mountain biking ?
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 9:28 am
You’re missing the point Elaycee. Its only giving the dreadful prick some free publicity.
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 9:38 am
@tdm – Fair call.
But if ‘publicity’ was a picture of Daffy sitting on his arse, with his blood spattered nose spread across his face and Whale standing over him ‘a la Muhammed Ali’ then maybe we could make an exception…
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 9:45 am
Tau could act as Whales second to rub in the humiliation.
Vote:May 29th, 2011 at 9:49 am
And to watch his back lest Daffy revert to type and try to slip in a king hit
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