Students too noisy with their bonking

September 4th, 2013 at 4:00 pm by David Farrar

The Fundy Post blogs:

News from University Hall, Auckland University’s latest money-making wheeze (sorry, I meant to say “integrated student accommodation environment” or something like that, but I just couldn’t) comes this  extraordinary  notice: “We have received several complaints of excessive noise of a sexual nature after 10pm. Although engaging in sexual activity is not discouraged, it would be prudent to note the accompanying noise may be heard by your neighbours. If you are unable to restrain these noises, we may have to ban sexual activity between 10pm and 6am.”

Heh. Good luck with that.

This is not a new problem. The walls at Carrington Hall in Dunedin were very thin, and you often could hear who was scoring. The main reason it was not a bigger problem is because the beds were so small, that they were called contraceptives! Of course a few of us upgraded to double beds at our own cost :-)

I also recall how in the 1950s Carrington (the first mixed hostel in Australasia) had rules stating that you could entertain a person of the other in your room for coffee or tea between 2 pm and 4 pm, but the door must remain ajar, all four feet on the ground, and all persons must remain fully clothed.

The end of year magazine had a very amusing cartoon showing a couple of standing in a room, behind an ajar door with the clock showing 3 pm. They are drinking tea, while having sex standing up :-)

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8 Responses to “Students too noisy with their bonking”

  1. Judith (8,375 comments) says:

    The faculty never likes to see/hear students enjoying themselves.

    I’m interested to know just what is considered ‘too noisy’? Perhaps I should insert the question in months assessment, the answers could be entertaining!

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  2. Daigotsu (451 comments) says:

    So did you get laid much at Uni DPF?

    [DPF: Nowhere near enough!]

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  3. anonymouse (708 comments) says:

    Well what do you expect from a place than specifically bans swappa-crates because they are
    “not consistent with the requirement of a moderate amount of alcohol and will not be permitted.”

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  4. alex Masterley (1,498 comments) says:

    Carrington had an annexe where the walls were pretty substantial. as I recall.

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  5. greenjacket (435 comments) says:

    “all four feet on the ground”
    Which confirms the widely held rumour about Carrington students and four-legged animals…

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  6. Ed Snack (1,793 comments) says:

    Not restricted to Dunedin, I recall some interesting activities in the YWCA (I think it was then) hostel Jean Batten House in upper Queen St in Auckland. Luckily it had fairly substantial walls !

    However I was a tenant in a flat that had matchboard and scrim walls, notorious for transmitting every snort, grunt, and moan ! And sports clubs with sleeping accommodation with just curtains for “doors”, required a stealth approach. Best ever overheard “noise” though was a 2 am comment “Oh No, not again..” in a sleepy and slightly horrified sounding male voice.

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  7. Captain Neurotic (206 comments) says:

    I remember my first week at Knox being on the ground floor and waking up to my bed being covered in plaster rom the ceiling for the entire week! Found out who it was and bought the lad a beer.

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  8. burt (7,994 comments) says:

    Well the gauntlet is down now … The news is out; Expect a 50,000% increase in both frequency and volume of “noises” for the next few weeks.

    A King & Queen of the Scream will be elected in due course.

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