Hooton’s A to Z

December 22nd, 2013 at 9:00 am by David Farrar

From NBR:

E is for English, as in Bill, the standout star of the cabinet, who can take the credit when the economy booms next year, and whose macroeconomic stewardship deserves better support from his senior colleagues who remain preoccupied with questionable one-off deals. 

F is for Free Democrats, a great name for a new classical-liberal party, although the German version had its worst result since 1949, falling below the 5% threshold, missing out on seats in the Bundestag, and thus threatening Angela Merkel’s hold on power despite her Christian Democrats being by far the most popular party.

I’d call a new classical-liberal party “The Liberal Party”. The name should make it clear what you stand for.

G is for Graham, as in McCready, who first put Trevor Mallard in the dock and now John Banks, and maybe David Cunliffe, putting the police to shame.

He has vowed to prosecute Cunliffe for his tweet.

J is for jealous, the feeling of all of us too stupid to buy Xero back at launch (partly made up for by not being so stupid as to buy Mighty River Power or Meridian).

I’ve purchased at launch Xero, Mighty River and Meridian and believe all will be good long-term investments.

L is for Louisa, as in Wall, who joins a small elite club, including Fran Wilde, Tim Barnett and Sue Bradford in actually achieving something as a backbencher.

O is for awesome, like the All Blacks, Valerie Adams, Lydia Ko, Lorde and, sadly, Oracle Team USA.

Z is for zoo, and Auckland’s will have a new elephant, by far the most substantial ever outcome by any prime minister at a CHOGM.

That is probably correct!

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18 Responses to “Hooton’s A to Z”

  1. Zapper (1,021 comments) says:

    Louisa Wall, one of the few to publicly support the man ban, proving she has no problem with discrimination when she benefits from it. She deserves no plaudits.

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  2. gump (1,647 comments) says:

    @Hoot0n

    “J is for jealous, the feeling of all of us too stupid to buy Xero back at launch (partly made up for by not being so stupid as to buy Mighty River Power or Meridian).”

    ————————–

    People forget that Xero shares fell in value after the company was floated, and traded below for the issue price for several years.

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  3. Urban_Redneck (86 comments) says:

    The Liberal Party. I can see it’s policy platform already: Crony capitalism, selling off large swathes of the country to foreigners, abortion on demand, enforced acceptance of sodomite lifestyles, euthanizing grannies and legalized drugs.

    The liberal party experiment didn’t work too well for ACT. The word “liberal” is too jaundiced.

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  4. duggledog (1,554 comments) says:

    I’d say Sue Bradford and Tim Barnett achieved precisely f*** all except to further damage the delicate fabric of society.

    Never forget Bradford admitting to Geoff Robinson that there is no difference between smacking a child’s bottom when it has been naughty and belting the same child round the head with 4 x 2. Both are assault and as bad as each other.

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  5. alwyn (424 comments) says:

    I believe Auckland already have an eleephant.
    It’s a white one called Len Brown.
    Quite, quite dead and smelling terribly.

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  6. OneTrack (3,088 comments) says:

    “Never forget Bradford admitting to Geoff Robinson that there is no difference between smacking a child’s bottom when it has been naughty and belting the same child round the head with 4 x 2.”

    So Ms Bradford used a bit of 4×2 when she disciplined her own children?

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  7. projectman (224 comments) says:

    He forgot about “C” for those who orchestrated the campaign against Chorus”.

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  8. Jack5 (5,137 comments) says:

    H is for housing, which we’re told the market doesn’t provide enough of …

    That’s what Hooton wrote in the NBR.

    H actually is for Hooters lobbying in effect for State hand-outs for fibre-to-the-door, and thus no friend of the free-market Right.

    H is also for Hooters on Labour Radio, which holds him up as the voice of the Right.

    H is also for Hooters the lobbyist for a hand-out mob, but with ambitions of resurrecting ACT.

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  9. tvb (4,416 comments) says:

    To have no 1 and no2 in the Government as the two top performers will make the Key government very hard to beat. Let that be a lesson when no 2 is often some party compromise designed to bring some sort of political stability.

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  10. WineOh (630 comments) says:

    How could L not be Loony Len the Let-down.

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  11. nasska (11,468 comments) says:

    It’ll make the Godaddled choke on their prayer books but a Liberal Party is exactly what we need, if for no other reason than to counter the priggish Conservatives.

    Anything to get government out of the bedrooms of NZ & allow citizens to dictate their own moral standards.

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  12. Johnboy (16,483 comments) says:

    I’ve just announced our wedding on GD nasska! :)

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  13. nasska (11,468 comments) says:

    Make sure you throw your bouquet to kowtow JB. :)

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  14. Harriet (4,969 comments) says:

    “……It’ll make the Godaddled choke on their prayer books but a Liberal Party is exactly what we need, if for no other reason than to counter the priggish Conservatives……..Anything to get government out of the bedrooms of NZ & allow citizens to dictate their own moral standards…..”

    Being disease and mental illness free, and having a longer life – is not ‘priggish morality’.

    And a Liberal Party will have to defend those charges. They have a monetary and social cost on wider society and the taxpayer should not have to foot the monetary bill nor the wider social problems.

    Where sex is concerned – morality is not just about the Acts of Sex – morality goes much further than just sexual acts. Consequences!

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  15. Ross Miller (1,704 comments) says:

    Tut Tut David … you forgot to mention Judith Collins among those who achieved something as a back-bencher. Indeed, some of those you quoted were either Govt Members or members of a Govt Support Party. Judith Collins’ achievement in 2003 as a newbe MP, and at the nadir of National’s fortunes, in forcing the Govt to investigate the effects of Agent Orange on our VVets when no-one, but no-one in Parliament wanted to know, far outweighs any of the so called ‘achievements’ you quoted.

    The VVet community will always be grateful to Judith Collins.

    Nuff said.

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  16. gump (1,647 comments) says:

    @Harriet

    “And a Liberal Party will have to defend those charges. They have a monetary and social cost on wider society and the taxpayer should not have to foot the monetary bill nor the wider social problems.”

    ———————–

    What is the monetary and social cost of failed heterosexual relationships? It’s rather high isn’t it?

    Are you therefore suggesting that the Government ban heterosexual relationships?

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  17. Manolo (13,745 comments) says:

    Who is Hooton’s puppeteer? Just asking.

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  18. Daigotsu (456 comments) says:

    Too many people are used to the American definition of ‘Liberal’.

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