Civilian Party makes it

August 13th, 2014 at 10:00 am by David Farrar

NewstalkZB reports:

Good news for fake news, with a satirical political party successfully registering just in time for the election.

The Electoral Commission has announced Party has got enough members on board to contest the election.

The party was born out of parody news website The Civilian, and promises free ice cream for everyone, and making the rest of New Zealand independent from Hamilton.

I’m glad they made it. Of all the joke parties standing for Parliament, they’re the only funny one!

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44 Responses to “Civilian Party makes it”

  1. Yogibear (375 comments) says:

    It is also the most honourable of all the rorting of the political processes this election

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  2. Redbaiter (10,407 comments) says:

    A waste of taxpayer money except for emphasizing the point that it is a gross injustice for the taxpayer to be compelled to fund political parties of any persuasion.

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  3. Judith (8,534 comments) says:

    Ah, they are just the same as all the others, what they are promising gives me the shits (ice cream has that effect on me).

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  4. Manolo (14,168 comments) says:

    Another joke inflicted on the taxpayer.
    If this people want to have “fun”, they should do it at their own expense.

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  5. Yogibear (375 comments) says:

    Red – for some reason I always picture you as Sam, the American Eagle from the Muppets.

    Staring out at the world from a perpetual mono-browed frown, disapproving of everything, and everyone.

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  6. Keeping Stock (9,380 comments) says:

    I’m glad they made it. Of all the joke parties standing for Parliament, they’re the only funny one!

    Sorry DPF; as much as I enjoy Ben’s off-beat take on the world, I don’t regard the waste of $33,635 of taxpayer funding on a broadcasting allocation to the Civilian Party as funny at all.

    http://www.elections.org.nz/news-media/2014-broadcasting-allocation-decision-released

    It’s an expensive joke, and once again the long-suffering taxpayer has to pick up the tab.

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  7. James Stephenson (2,266 comments) says:

    Should put a useful dent in the Internet Mana idiot protest vote.

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  8. Redbaiter (10,407 comments) says:

    Yes, you may well have that view Yogi, but that’s because you’re a soft headed uneducated well indocrinated progressive with out a clue to save yourself. In your dark degenerate ignorance, big govt might be your holy grail but its anathema to the civilised.

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  9. Yogibear (375 comments) says:

    …..Cheers Red, so I guess in your view that makes me Gonzo the Great?

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  10. Redbaiter (10,407 comments) says:

    KS, the point you’re missing and that The Civilian is making is that its all a joke. If the Civilian shouldn’t be funded (and I agree) then neither should any other party.

    What’s the real difference between “free” icecream and “free” health care?

    Just the same hollow confidence trick or joke if you like.

    The real tragedy is that such bullshit resonates with a large sector of the voting public.

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  11. Nigel Kearney (1,096 comments) says:

    I don’t regard the waste of $33,635 of taxpayer funding on a broadcasting allocation to the Civilian Party as funny at all.

    The total across all parties is a fixed amount so was always going to be spent by somebody. It’s the same as if they subtracted $33,635 from the broadcasting allocation and gave it to NZ on Air who used it to fund a comedy show, i.e. a better use of the money.

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  12. OneTrack (3,358 comments) says:

    I thought InternetNoMana had the free icecream vote already covered.

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  13. JC (950 comments) says:

    I’m indebted to the CP for being able to exclaim after every bribe by a party leader “And a free Llama for every kiddie!”

    JC

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  14. Redbaiter (10,407 comments) says:

    It just makes you someone with off topic crap who doesn’t give a fuck about commenting protocol here.

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  15. BlairM (2,340 comments) says:

    KS – it’s not like that money is extra money. It would have been allocated to someone else otherwise. Probably someone a lot less entertaining. Frankly, I believe they should get the entire lot, since it’s unlikely to affect the outcome in the end.

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  16. RightNow (7,014 comments) says:

    Free ice cream and llamas? Their promises are a joke!
    If they want to play with the big kids they’d better up their bribes.

    Free boats and helicopters at least.

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  17. Goldsmith (27 comments) says:

    What a farce.

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  18. Pete George (23,798 comments) says:

    Apart from being so late getting registered the biggest problem for the Civilian Party is getting noticed amongst all the farce and un-intended self-satire of the other parties.

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  19. Peter (1,694 comments) says:

    They will never be funnier than the Greens.

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  20. OTGO (579 comments) says:

    I was saying to my wife this morning that this election was lacking in humour. Hopefully the other parties will up their game and there will be an outbreak of humour to balance the current outbreak of nastiness.

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  21. john (50 comments) says:

    What a sad sad life some of you lead. Politics is supposed to be FUN, yes it is serious but it needs to be FUN!! I am a campaign chair and there are days that leave me wanting to pull what hair I have left in frustration at stupid-people, things, actions. If these guys can bring a little levity to what is a nasty campaign then I say let us laugh. Lets face it, free ice cream and llamas are not the silliest policies out there. God forbid if we loose we will at least have something to eat as the economy crashes around us and we will be able to sit in our hovels spinning and knitting llama singlets to keep warm. FFS lighten up!!!

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  22. KiwiGreg (3,278 comments) says:

    If all they do is soak up 10-20,000 votes that would have otherwise gone to Green or IMP they’ll be doing ok.

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  23. dime (10,213 comments) says:

    How much will this cost us?

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  24. backster (2,196 comments) says:

    Maybe their leader will make a secret visit to Dotcom and offer to join his coalition for a reduced price , say a million.

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  25. timmydevo (53 comments) says:

    I divided the $33,635 by the population per head of New Zealand. It came out (basically) as FREE! How can anyone argue with that?

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  26. dime (10,213 comments) says:

    “I divided the $33,635 by the population per head of New Zealand. It came out (basically) as FREE! How can anyone argue with that?”

    well thank god for that. i was expecting 500k.

    still 33 grand.. basically all the PAYE some dude on 120k a year paid last year….

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  27. RRM (10,099 comments) says:

    Has Kolin Cwaig threatened legal action yet?

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  28. Colville (2,318 comments) says:

    The amount allocated was fixed so I am glad Ben gets to spend some of it to hopefully bring a smile to the silliness of the next month and a half. Less than one cent per person in NZ.

    I am happy to be counted in the 500 that signed up :-) It cost a dollar!

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  29. labrator (1,851 comments) says:

    Has anyone investigated any ties that Ben Uffindell may have with Tip-top? Has he invested in any Alpaca farms lately? Where’s an investigative journalist who can peer through his twitter feed and facebook page history and, if they can be bothered or have heard of it, the companies office registry too. For all we know this is just a far-right rort selling out to big business again promising huge Government contracts for the supply of ice-cream and Llamas. After all, he’s got a business, and he wants to get in to politics therefore he must be evil. More like Ben Uffinsellout, where’s my insta-effigy kit when I need it.

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  30. Reboot (103 comments) says:

    For those complaining about taxpayer funding, the problem is we have a pussy ass PM who lacks the balls to make any changes to electoral law while in government.

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  31. adc (558 comments) says:

    I’m looking forward to seeing how they poll.

    They so far have shown less cause to doubt their integrity than any other party I can think of.

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  32. iMP (2,456 comments) says:

    Holding rigidly to the rules but using no common sense. Civilian should not be a registered party. It further erodes any respect voters have in our political system.

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  33. MH (830 comments) says:

    Fonterra has to be getting a kick back. Civilian party will get licked come the day. I doubt whether they even know how the Duckworth Lewis formula works if it rains on election day.

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  34. mara (770 comments) says:

    The Civilian Party is neither satirical nor funny. It is all about children playing with grown up’s money.

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  35. ross411 (904 comments) says:

    Judith (7,996 comments) says:
    August 13th, 2014 at 10:11 am
    Ah, they are just the same as all the others, what they are promising gives me the shits (ice cream has that effect on me).

    Well Helen, on your high UN paygrade, you eat a higher grade of icecream than the rest of us plebes. But hey, you just keep sitting there, drinking out of your I LUV NZ cup, and posting your negative pro-labour spiel here. Vote greens.. indeed..

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  36. ross411 (904 comments) says:

    dime (9,549 comments) says:
    August 13th, 2014 at 11:19 am
    “I divided the $33,635 by the population per head of New Zealand. It came out (basically) as FREE! How can anyone argue with that?”

    well thank god for that. i was expecting 500k.

    still 33 grand.. basically all the PAYE some dude on 120k a year paid last year….

    Non-Labour problem Dime. Duh. Remember, Labour’s management steals their employees PAYE and gives it to Labour, and stiffs the IRD. Sounds like a win win for Labour.

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  37. adc (558 comments) says:

    I wonder if they intend to actually spend that money. I’d actually be surprised if they do.

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  38. ChardonnayGuy (1,232 comments) says:

    They’re the only intentionally humorous one, certainly.

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  39. Manolo (14,168 comments) says:

    @Reboot: Right on the money!

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  40. David Garrett (7,699 comments) says:

    No-one has pointed out the obvious elephant in the room…this young joker has managed to sign up 500 people to form a “political party”…but Old Red hasn’t managed it…

    That’s right campers – not even 500 voters in our fair land think Red’s prescriptions are worth a damn…You think he’d studiously avoid this thread, but he’s got so little self insight that he is all over it! Too funny.

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  41. Nookin (3,561 comments) says:

    DG

    Does that mean that the astonishing number of up-ticks that he manages to achieve are duplications?

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  42. mara (770 comments) says:

    Well done political satire is necessary and priceless but the Civilian chap does not cut it. How desperate are we for satirical humour that we accept this young bloke’s version as worthy of acclaim? Or payment. I REALLY wish we had better talent than this.

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  43. Christopher Thomson (377 comments) says:

    “….. further erodes any respect voters have in our political system.” How can you erode anything from nothing?

    And yes, i signed up – free ice-cream won my support.

    It’s got to be cheaper in the long term than any of the other bribes tht are being thrown about. At least this one is targeted at my demographic.

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  44. eszett (2,450 comments) says:

    iMP (2,284 comments) says:
    August 13th, 2014 at 12:00 pm
    Holding rigidly to the rules but using no common sense. Civilian should not be a registered party. It further erodes any respect voters have in our political system.

    ACT and National and especially IMP ( the party, not you) are doing a much better job at that.

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