Slam and Dunk
March 10th, 2009 at 9:18 pm by David FarrarTwo hilarious moments in Parliament. First we had Anderton wasting his one question a month, trying to be pious as usual:
Hon JIM ANDERTON (Leader—Progressive) to the Prime Minister: How many jobs will be created for unemployed New Zealanders as a result of the reinstatement of the titles of Knight and Dame Grand Companion in the New Zealand honours system?
Hon JOHN KEY (Prime Minister) : None will be created and none will be lost. The member misunderstands the purpose of reinstating the titles.
A nice swat away. But Anderton persists and persist and finally we get:
Hon Jim Anderton: What items on the list of things the Government has made its higher priorities in Government will do the most to reduce the impact of global recession: bringing back knighthoods, a national cycleway, or privatising prisons?
Hon JOHN KEY: All three can play a part in helping our economy to grow. I am surprised, I have to say, that Mr Anderton has come down to the House today with this primary question. Funnily enough, I took a moment out of my busy schedule to have a look through the archives, and I noticed that in 1997 the Hon Jim Anderton introduced the Exceptional Service Honour (Posthumous Recognition) Bill. He sought to have that bill passed, and, lo and behold, the bill—which he waxed lyrical about, but I will not bore members with it—would have conferred an honour with the status of a knighthood. That was what the bill was trying to do. Jim Anderton not only tried to create his own new honour, with the status of a knighthood, in 1997; he actually had tried it once before, in 1991.
Hilarious. Anderton twice introduced a bill to give the equivalent of a knighthood to someone who died in WWI 90 years ago, and he is stupid enough to them try and ask a question complaining about the Government “wasting” time on knighthoods. To say people were laughing is putting it mildly.
Whichever staffer dug that piece of info up, deserves a jellybean.
Then we had Sue Moroney going on about pay equity to Pansy Wong. And I loved this exchange:
Sue Moroney: Why did the Minister ignore a protest on this issue by school support workers in Hamilton on Friday, and then, just minutes later, tell the Hamilton International Women’s Day Symposium that the gender pay gap was too large in New Zealand and she wanted to do more, when her Government is actually guilty of doing less?
Hon PANSY WONG: I hardly ignored the handful of protesters in Hamilton. I actually told them to please take care and not get too wet.
Wonderful answer. She told them not to get too wet.
Tags: Jim Anderton, John Key, Pansy Wong, Parliament
March 10th, 2009 at 9:40 pm
Anderton twice introduced a bill to give the equivalent of a knighthood to someone who died in WWI 90 years ago, and he is stupid enough to them try and ask a question complaining about the Government “wasting” time on knighthoods.
I don’t think this is right. Jim introduced the bill so he could confer a posthumous knighthood on Peter Mahon of Erebus fame and the WWI reference is actually to Robert Falcon Scott (c. 1912) who was used as a precedent for a posthumous knighthood (although looking it up on wiki, I see what actually happened was something else).
[DPF: It was about Colonel Malone in WWI]
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 9:42 pm
Was Jim boy aware of his faux pas?
Did his mealy mouthed little question really ever look anything other than trite, and pathetic. Even before the revelation?
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 9:44 pm
Oh dear. These folk are even worse at being in opposition than they were at being in government. Epic Fail.
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 9:51 pm
And to think that John Key has no experience at all.
All of Labours lies about him being potentially a problem.
If we carry through Klunks theory, he will never be replaced.
BTW any news on the cruel witch of the South?
Have re-read Wishart’s tour de force, ‘Absolute Power’. My God, if she gets the job in the UN, I for one will be sending every delegate to the Council a copy.
Cold and calculating, but I am happy to do anything to stick the boot into that Tartar.
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 9:58 pm
School Support Staff.
Vote:They are the aristocrats of the working class.
If put on a competitive basis they would be all be on $12.50 per hour. They have Lord knows how many holidays. They work 8.30 to 3.15 per day making the job the most sought after for extremely competent experienced women who want to get home to their children. Mothers are queuing up for the jobs, because the jobs are overpaid.
And how would I know?
As a former treasurer of an intermediate school Board of Trustees I saw with my own eyes. I employed eight clerical employees at that time. Every one of my employees who was the mother of school age children would have dumped me and gone to the school job, if they had the chance. As a private sector employer I would not have been able to match the school support pay structure AND stay in business. Interestingly, if my former employees were not smart enough to recognise that basic fact I would not have employed them.
School support staff need people like Sue Moroney to preserve their privileged position.
AN ANECDOTE
While on that Board I heard from the Teachers’ Union moll that teachers were going on strike for the good of the children’s education. I responded that “teachers going on strike for the good of the children’s education was like fucking for virginity”. The chair, or was it the table, or was it the couch – well some form of furniture, remarked that my use of that obscene word was disgraceful.
March 10th, 2009 at 10:15 pm
DPF said: Wonderful answer. She told them not to get too wet. and, daft lefty that I am, I just don’t get it.
[DPF: That does not surprise me at all. I could explain how she gave an overly literal answer combined with humour, to avoid the main question, but you know explaining is losing so I won't]
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 10:18 pm
ummmm – perhaps it was raining …. yes, last Friday, I do believe it was
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 10:18 pm
greenflee; that’s because your a wet behind the ears dropkick utopian insect.
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 10:22 pm
You are right Inventory2! And what a wonderful answer! That Patsy Wong – she’s a card!
Vote:And dad – that hilarious thing you do with my name! You righties, oh you are wags!
March 10th, 2009 at 10:31 pm
DPF: That does not surprise me at all. I could explain how she gave an overly literal answer combined with humour, to avoid the main question, but you know explaining is losing so I won’t]
You slay me! I’ve looked at it again and you are right, it is hilarious!!!
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 10:31 pm
ha had a chuckle at pansy wong’s reply..brilliant!
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 10:34 pm
“You slay me!”
Don’t you mean – you spray me!
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 10:37 pm
I’ve no sense of humour at all! What a dullard I am! Off to bed to try to sharpen up a bit.
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 10:39 pm
Night night and don’t let the bed bugs bite.
Vote:March 10th, 2009 at 10:52 pm
Appears to be all about Currency
Vote:Sir has more Currency than NZOM anyday. Thats what our Mates want and that is all they are prepared to pay for!!
Just like I told Sir Don – “my children will encounter yours in imminent years”
What I have told them – what they will incise, will sink Sir’s Will melodiously.
March 10th, 2009 at 11:55 pm
Ahh, the pleasant sound of lefty anguish in which we can revel now the Lefties have lost the opportunity to fuck up the country anymore. It used to be serious when they were in power, now it’s just funny.
Greenfly, does it strike you as odd that we haven’t yet heard from the Nats anything remotely like the equivalent of ‘we won, you lost, eat that?’
Hint: this is because we’re the good guys. You might want to think on that for awhile.
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 12:52 am
the darkness of light
Vote:the dryness of rain and the
humour of pansy
March 11th, 2009 at 6:57 am
Jim Anderton looks like a fool. So just another normal day in New Zealand politics then.
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 7:35 am
Watching Question Time, I almost threw my cup of tea through the TV when I saw Ruth Dyson complaining about an asnwer she didn’t like. She spent nine years (except for the few months when she was benched for being a pissed driver) not answering anything.
Also, please tell me if I am wrong – but does Catherine Delahunty look like the crazy cat woman from the Simpsons or not?
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 7:38 am
Those were good answers, but we reckon that Judith Collins’ hit on Phil Goff was the best of all:
http://keepingstock.blogspot.com/2009/03/hoist-by-his-own-petard.html
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 7:40 am
Brian – it might be because the House now has a Speaker who is determined to have everyone play by the rules. In the past we had Jonathan Hunt and Margaret Wilson …..
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 7:58 am
And speaking of the Rt. Honorable Dr. Margaret Wilson, go read her hypocritical letter from Cambridge, England, sneering at the change in the NZ honours system. FFS with all her snooty titles she objects to Colin Meads becoming Sir Colin Meads!
[DPF: Where is it?]
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 8:16 am
Fantastic. Great to see some wit and dry humour in our politicians instead of the abusive, nasty, name calling that can go on.
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 8:22 am
So does Colin!
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 8:22 am
I wasn’t that sure Pansy Wong’s english was up to making jokes like that, but maybe i’m just distracted by her accent…
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 8:24 am
Brian Smaller … re your 7.35. Yes
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 8:36 am
Delahunty read my palm at the pikeys fair in Napier.
Her caravan has 8 cats.
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 8:36 am
Collins put down of hapless Goff yesterday was brilliant.
And for Cullen in his Supplementary to confuse the integrity of our own judiciary with that of the Labour Party … nuff said
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 9:12 am
And speaking of the Rt. Honorable Dr. Margaret Wilson, go read her hypocritical letter from Cambridge, England, sneering at the change in the NZ honours system. FFS with all her snooty titles she objects to Colin Meads becoming Sir Colin Meads!
[DPF: Where is it?]
Today’s New Zealand Herald
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 9:42 am
Until when do we have to put up with the tired socialist mantra spouted by the sclerotic Anderton? His contribution to NZ politics has been very small compared to the enormous damage he’s inflicted on our country over the years.
It’s time for the old Stalinist to retire and never be seen again.
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 9:54 am
Manolo – until a tiny bit of intelligence gets punched into the voters in Wigram ………….. unfortunate as it might take a while.
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 10:06 am
Madeleine said: dry humour
Glutaemus Maximus visits the tents of fortune tellers. That tells us a lot about the credibility of his predictions! Did you cross her palm with silver?
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 10:14 am
“First we had Anderton wasting his one question a month, trying to be pious as usual:”
Good word that “pious”. Anderton comes across as one of the most offensive sanctimonious arrogant and self righteous fools on the left.
Worse even then Dunne.
No, Dunne is worse.
Ahh, no Anderton is worse.
Jeezuz, if only we could be rid of both these destructive parasites forever.
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 10:30 am
http://www.scoop.co.nz/stories/PA0903/S00149.htm
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 10:42 am
“Order! I accept that members might find it amusing, but it is a point of order and therefore it should be heard in silence. Is there any objection to that poem being tabled?”
Swoon. A proper speaker at last.
This is why National wont be as arrogant in power as Labour was. They have installed an impartial speaker, rather than simply given one of their partisans a big stick.
Vote:March 11th, 2009 at 11:17 am
I really don’t think the sort of speaker is going to make more than a little difference re: ‘arrogance’ (except in parliamentary exchanges), both parties can and have rammed through legislation and there isn’t much a speaker can do about that.
Vote: