A day in the life of the Foreign Minister

9.00 a.m. Turn up

9.30 a.m. Approve press release announcing you have appointed the Ambassador your officials have told you to appoint.

10.00 a.m. Ask officials if you can meet the new Ambassador at some stage

10.30 a.m. Tune into Racing Channel

11.00 a.m. Ignore noise from External Affairs and Defence Cabinet Committee meeting on next floor up which you are not attending.

11.30 a.m. Ask officials for a report on where Thailand is, and should you congratulate the Prime Minister who is resigning despite being re-elected.

12.00 p.m. Lunch

2.00 p.m. Go to House and follow instructions of:
(a) Annoy Gerry
(b) Defend Helen
(c) Attack Greens

3.00 p.m. Ask Helen why you aren’t allowed to travel to the United States with everyone else.

4.00 p.m. Write $40,000 cheque out to the MP for Tauranga.

4.30 p.m. Leave office early to avoid meeting Chinese Premier during their trade talks, as you are opposed to them. Make sure of early night (1.00 am) so fresh for photo op with Premier the next day once all the business is over.

ADDENDUM: Photo Op with a greyhound.

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