How the Aussies saw us

An amusing AAP story on what NZ stories got reported in Australia:

  1. William Stewart avoiding the police for 100 days
  2. Westpac accidentally giving a customer a $10 million overdraft, which was utilised to flee overseas
  3. A man vying for the title of New Zealand’s most incompetent criminal left his name and contact details with a shop before robbing it and fleeing
  4. Kiwi primary schoolteacher Rachel Whitwell posing nude for Australian Penthouse
  5. Policeman Guy Baldwin captured on camera interviewing a late-night carjacker who was trying to claim he was merely off to buy a meat pie at the local service station. Baldwin’s witty reply was: “That pie has probably been in the warming drawer for about 12 hours. It will be thermo-nuclear – always blow on the pie.
  6. A beloved family cat had an extra chilly brush with death after his owners accidentally shut him in the freezer for 19 hours
  7. Sweet maker Hanna Frederick developed venison chocolate truffles
  8. A Kiwi canine was in the dog box after driving his owner’s ute into the front of a cafe
  9. New Zealand’s most superstitious town has gone all out to be rid of bad luck by banishing the number 13. Palmerston North has a council policy to jump street numbers from number 11 to 15 to avoid the unlucky figure in between.
  10. An Auckland man who killed his dog and barbecued it for tea expressed genuine shock when local authorities baulked at his actions
  11. The Kiwi recession was responsible for many an oddity in 2009. For one, Kiwi men were more likely than ever to get “the snip” on their most intimate assets as a reaction to the financial squeeze
  12. A curious baby seal shuffled more than 100km across New Zealand farmland after an overexcited fishing expedition.
  13. Tourists at a Kiwi aquarium got an eyeful when they saw a heavily-pregnant female shark get a Caesarean section from an aggressive male shark in the tank
  14. A would-be Kiwi politician was creamed with an iconic Australasian treat, the lamington, while trying to convince the public to vote for him. John Boscawen was hit in the head with the square chocolate and cream coconut sponge and then further shocked the audience by continuing his speech, unfazed
  15. A toddler gave her parents a nasty shock when they found she had bought a NZ$20,000 earth-moving digger on New Zealand auction website TradeMe

No wonder they think we are strange.

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