The NZ Herald has a regular weekly feature where they interview someone on ten lessons they have learnt from life, so to speak. Nice light stuff, which unfortunately is not part of their online site.
Having had Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston turn them down, they interviewed me instead.
A copy of an earlier draft (it may have changed a bit) is below for those who want to see some good mistakes to avoid
1. Never be at the front of the queue to get off the bus: When I was 11, I was on my school bus and at the door waiting to get off. The driver opened the doors while pulling into the bus stop, and a surge behind me pushed me out the bus door. I bounced off a car parked at the back of the bus stop, and went under the back wheel of the bus. Having a ten tonne bus drive over your foot is rather painful, but being a good capitalist I limped around my newspaper run to earn a few dollars of income, and then headed to the medical centre to report that my foot and leg hurt as a bus had run over them.
2. If you send anonymous flowers to a girl, make sure you donNo tag for this post.