NZPA report:

A new report reveals New Zealand teachers are still paid far less than their Aussie counterparts, says the education sector union NZEI Te Riu Roa.

The Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) has released a report, Education at a Glance 2010, which compares the education systems of 29 countries.

The report shows a New Zealand primary school teacher with 15 years experience earns $US38,412 ($NZ52,871) but an Australian teacher, with the same experience, earns $US46,096 ($NZ63,447).

If the Government was serious about closing the pay gap and retaining teachers then it had to invest in education, NZEI president Frances Nelson said.

I am not surprised teachers in Australia get paid more. Everyone in Australia gets paid more – they are a wealthier country. The solution to this problem is to increase productivity growth.

The better comparison between countries is how much do teachers get paid, compared to the average wage, or how much does a country spend on education as a percentage of GDP.

The OECD report answers the latter.

In Australia 3.5% of GDP is spent on non-tertiary education, and in New Zealand it is 4.0%. So we are already paying more as a percentage of GDP, than Australia. Hence the solution is to increase GDP, not to increase the share spent on education.

Only three OECD countries spend a higher percentage of GDP on non-tertiary education than New Zealand.

The Herald editorial:

Hats off to the Labour Party leader, Phil Goff. In suggesting that New Zealanders should start talking about our country becoming a republic, he has gone where influential sitting politicians have feared to tread.

Most, including the current Prime Minister, talk about the inevitability of a republic but are unwilling to do anything to create it.

Others, such as former Deputy Prime Minister Michael Cullen, wait until they have retired from politics to voice similar sentiments. Such passivity has dampened the prospect of debate.

I agree.  It has been frustrating that previous Leaders such as Helen Clark refused to openly engage on the merits of becoming a republic. Instead she did republicanism by stealth – changing individual aspects (such as the Privy Council) one by one, without actually engaging the public in a debate on republicanism.

I don’t want a republic by stealth. I want a republic that New Zealanders vote for, as a better way forward. For that debate to happen, senior political leaders like Phil Goff need to engage on the issue.

Yet this is an issue that, given the absence of stridency on both sides, will have to be galvanised by political leaders.

Mr Goff has acknowledged as much in stating emphatically that a republic would be the “making of New Zealand as a country”. If he has his way, that notion will have seeped into the national consciousness by the end of Queen Elizabeth II’s reign.

But we should not wait until then.

Matthew Hooton also writes in the NBR today on a republic:

One day, though, Queen Elizabeth II’s reign will come to an end, the Prince of Wales will immediately become King Charles III of New Zealand, and we’ll panic and rush reform and get it wrong.

(That’s if he calls himself “King Charles III”.  Apparently he’s keen on being “King George VII”.  Go figure.)

The Queen has carried out her duties with impeccable integrity, never once having been known to interfere in New Zealand’s affairs, even privately, and in effect making us a de facto republic throughout her reign.

In contrast, King Charles (or is it George?), is an eco-extremist, advocate for neo-Roman architecture and devotee of quack medicine and cannot be so relied upon to operate as a responsible constitutional monarch.

Plus he talks to plants.

Heh, Matthew does not hold back.

We’re in the bizarre situation where all important New Zealand leaders, once out of office, apparently become advocates for constitutional reform but no one dares put a hand up when they could actually do something as an incumbent.

Exactly. And Phil Goff has an opportunity to say that if he becomes PM, he will push for having a public debate and vote on constitutional reform.

TV3 have done a great job with their expose of a top defence official’s fake CV. The claims made on there should have been simple to verify, and it is disturbing that this was not done.

I think the government should consider appointing an independent person to inquire into how this happened.

Meanwhile Twitter has had fun, with the #defenceforcejobinterview tag providing:

• I raced against Usain Bolt in the 2008 Beijing Olympics; finished in the top 6, but he got all of the attention
• I convinced Tolkien to become a writer
• You’ve never seen one of course,but my face is in fact on the Medals at the olympics in recognition my successes
• Well, I get a bit upset when people call it “divine” intervention. But hey, that’s life

• Hairy Maclary was actually Lynley’s ‘special’ name for me in bed
• Well I made up sign language! Helen Keller just happened to be there at the time!
• So I said to Winston C, “Why not attack them on the beaches?
• It was gonna be Oceans 3, but I said, Why not ask George, Brad, Matt, if they have any mates they wanna bring…

• I was there when Māui fished up the North Island… I was the one who suggested he use his granny’s jawbone hook!

• If you look at the footage of the ’87 RWC victory, I’m the guy in the red jacket behind David Kirk.
• Richard actually based Rocky Horror on a Hamilton Boy’s College after ball party we had
• “It was just an offhand remark, but I said what if you made it TWO all beef patties, Special sauce…. “
• I did some PR consulting work for Shakespeare a few years back. Before then, they spelled bard with a small b.

• I told him, that jarjarbinks character was gunna ruin the movie, but would he listen ?

• Well love, as there’s still cancer I’ll admit that I’ve got at least one weakness

This week the House voted to send the Manukau City Council (Regulation of Prostitution in Specified Places) Bill to select committee by 82-36. The bill’s purpose is:

This Bill provides for local bylaw control over the locations where the business of prostitution or commercial sexual services may occur when that business or those services take place or are conducted other than in a brothel or a small owner-operated brothel in Manukau City.

Ironic the bill has its first reading a few weeks before the Council disappears. I guess it can be amended to the Auckland Council, but am not sure the Auckland Council wants the power.

I was an active support of Tim Barnett’s bill to legalise prostitution (or more correctly solicitation). But I do appreciate Manukau does have some specific problems, and generally favouring the subsidiarity principle.

If I was an MP, I probably would have voted Yes at first reading – mainly to allow select committee submissions.

The Clerk’s Office has kindly supplied the breakdown of how the MPs voted. A summary by party is:

• National 58-0 in favour
• Labour 17-25 (C Carter not vote)
• Greens 2-6 (Norman not vote)
• Maori 0-5
• ACT 5-0
• Dunne and Anderton did not vote

It was meant to be a conscience vote, but I wonder if National were whipped to vote yes? I’m very suspicious that not a single MP voted against. Maybe, like me, they all thought it deserves select committee hearings.

The bill was put forward by Labour MP George Hawkins, but most of his colleagues voted against it.

Somewhat surprisingly all of ACT voted for it, and all of Maori voted against it.

Tom Young, who is working with Sam Johnson, on the student volunteer clean-up of affected Christchurch properties has e-mailed:

At the moment we basically have the problem that we have a lot of volunteers willing and able to help, but not enough jobs to do. I’m just wondering if any of your readers know of any properties in the Christchurch region that need a hand, we`re predominately moving silt and other earthquake related rubbish from properties. If your readers know of any properties which have this sort of damage we can help if they email [email protected], describing the problem, their address and a contact number. If no-one is home it would be good if the owners put a note on the door giving permission for us to do the work as well.

So if any readers are in Christchurch, and would like some student help, or know someone who would – just e-mail Sam.

One from my flying gannet collection.

Now, I haven’t fully recovered from China, so am off to mainline some espressos. Hope everybody has a good Friday.

Cactus Kate has a brilliant idea:

I have previously endorsed Cameron Brewer as a candidate for the Auckland Supercity. I now add two more endorsements but only if you vote for them together. What the Supercity needs is checks and balances. There can be no greater check and balance for the incumbent candidate “Mayor” Andrew Williams than to elect in Albany, Cameron Slater aka Whaleoil.

What genius. Can you imagine it – Williams and the Whale having to sit around the same table for three years. Either they’ll become good mates (unlikely) or the Auckland Council will resemble live episodes of the Jerry Springer show. One could televise Council meetings on a pay per view channel.

Cactus also compares their vital stats:

Age: 51 v 41
Born: Hawkes Bay v Fiji
Weight: 110kgs with body paint, 95 without v fighting weight of 100kgs
Height: Scarcely taller than a parking meter v 5 foot 11
Drugs of choice: Alcohol and various prescription drugs v Melatonin and off depression meds
Mental State: Allegedly mad v certifiably mad
Education: Advanced Marketing Management Diploma from the International Marketing Institute of New Zealand v Whaleoil who hasn’t bothered making one up
Religion: Worships at the Gods of Caroma v Christian
Credit Card: Now only a personal one v no credit
Looks: Chubby preppy cheek v Angry Chopper Read
Spouse: Angry Jane v Angrier Spanish Bride
Work history: Diplomat to country where English is not a first language v IT and security
Drives: Black Nissan Maxima v Whaleoil Truck
Children: 24, 21 and 17 vs 14 and 12
Internet Presence: Hasn’t quite got used to it after 6 days blogging v Dominant
Supercity concept: Hates it v Loves it
Walking Style: wobbly lines utilising entire ratepayer resource of pavement v straight line won’t move for anyone
Favourite Attire: Custom fitted short man’s suit v Whaleoil t-shirt
Current employment: Bludging off the ratepayer v Campaigning to bludge off the ratepayer
Favourite Tipple: Anything on stock at GPK v Only when Cactus is in town
Favourite Hobbie: Gardening with his mate Little Andrew v Gardening on Spanish Bride’s orders with a chainsaw and round-up
Favourite MP: Winston Peters v Crusher Collins
Favourite restaurant: GPK v Daikoku looking down on GPK
Pet Hates: Cameron Slater v Winston Peters and Andrew Williams (those two really should have a drink together at GPK sometimes)
Nicknames: Clown/Cock of Campbells Bay, Mad Mayor v Whaleoil
Pets: Cute dog named Rimu v the Black Dog and David Farrar
Favourite Journalist: Late night calls with Jonathan Marshall v Jonathan Marshall……..Finally some common ground
PR/Media handling style: Combative v Combative
Weasel words: “Reducing rates – In the first year as Mayor we reduced the rates increase to 5.9%” v no weasel words
Pressure release: Late night abusive emails v All day abusive internet posts

Whether you’re from the right, the left or the centre – doesn’t the thought of Andrew Williams and Cameron Slater as fellow Albany Councillors for three years tempt you as proof there is karma?

Trevor Mallard highlighted this speech from Amy Adams, which he rightly said captures the anguish of so many in Canterbury.

Because no one died, it is tempting to downplay the impact of the earthquake, or in fact earthquakes in Canterbury. I recommend people listen to Amy’s speech.

Amy also blogged a couple of days ago on the quake:

The early hours of Saturday morning were without doubt some of the scariest of my life. Wrenched from deep sleep by violent tremors and a deafening roar, the mind can’t even comprehend what is happening.

Once I realised it was an earthquake the next thought was quite simply that we were going to die. There just didn’t seem any way the house could withstand the forces throwing it around. In those moments your instinct is simply to reach out for your family.

Grabbing my husband we both started screaming out to my daughter (my son was thankfully away in a safe area) and as soon as we could stand we pushed through debris in total blackness to my daughter’s room. Later when the sun came up I would learn that the fish tank that flew across her room missed her head by mere inches before crashing on the bed post but at that moment the priority was getting everyone into the kitchen and under our very solid table.

In the darkness the house felt totally unfamiliar and progress was slow picking our way through the remains of our once treasured possessions. In bare feet broken glass was the biggest challenge and once we reached the table it felt like a refuge. We huddled together there for a while before venturing out for blankets, shoes and our civil defence kit which luckily enough we had.

Treasury are now talking $4 billion as the total cost.

For those who like their art and fashion, you may want to check out Here Comes the Sun, which is run by Kiwi Amanda Thomas, and has a lot of overseas followers.

Appropriate Responses

1. Burn 200 bibles
2. Ignore the rantings of a church with only 50 members, of which only 20 are taking part, who only want publicity
3. Peaceful protest
4. Condemnation by other religious figures
5. Do nothing

Inappropriate Responses

1. Jihad
2. Turning the media stunt of a dozen demented nutters into the biggest global news story on the planet
3. Blaming the US Government
4. Idiot news presenters asking whether the Government will stop the event
5. Making Koran (or bible) burning a criminal offence
6. Any threats of violence
7. Having the UN Secretary-General call the proposed burning “intolerable”

I note that the pastor, Terry Jones, has also said he plans to burn a copy of the Talmud. I doubt that will generate 0.1% of the stories that buring a Koran does.

The Herald reports:

The Government has set aside $2.4 million for trauma counselling for Christchurch earthquake victims, Social Welfare Minister Paula Bennett says.

Speaking in Christchurch, she said 34 counsellors from across New Zealand would head to the quake-stricken city today.

Oh God. Now I do feel sorry for the locals. It could be worse though. The Government could be flying 34 lawyers in.

The Herald reports:

A colossal turnout for nationwide protests against pension reform yesterday threatened President Nicolas Sarkozy with a long winter of discontent if he pushes ahead with plans to increase the French retirement age from 60 to 62.

Trade unions comfortably exceeded their target of mobilising two million people on the streets as a nationwide strike disrupted transport, schools, government offices and parts of the media.

In Paris, the demonstration was so large – an estimated 270,000 people, or twice the numbers of the last protest in June – that the march had to be split into two halves.

More than 100 marches across the country attracted 2.5 million people, according to union estimates.

They are complaining about 62, when Australia and other countries are moving to 67 or 68.

It is inevitable that in NZ, the age will increase from 65 also.

John Armstrong writes:

The politicians are already playing politics, however, though not too flagrantly. Saying you are not going to play politics – as Goff effectively did – is itself a political statement. As was John Key’s decision to cancel his trip to Britain and France. As was Labour’s suggestion that yesterday was not the day for the verbal combat of ministers’ question-time in Parliament to be on display.

I thought that was very smart, and impressed that Labour suggested it. The decision provoked some hysteria from No Right Turn:

Meanwhile, Parliament has cancelled Question Time today, on the grounds that holding the government to account might be upsetting to the people of Christchurch. So, the earthquake hasn’t just damaged several Canterbury landmarks, but our democracy as well. If the politicians believe it is unseemly to query and crow about the earthquake response (which has been good – an example of what government can do for us), then they could not do so. But to deem it unseemly to question the government in any way in the wake of a crisis comes disturbingly close to fascism.

Yes having the Opposition offer to have one less question time a year, is indeed close to fascism. I mean it is just like burning down the Reichstag.

Armstrong continues:

As was the PM’s second visit to Christchurch since the quake. As was Goff’s decision to ask to accompany Key in what was his second visit to the city in almost as many days.

Again thought that was a very neat thing to do.

Labour argues that Goff’s presence is justified by Christchurch being a Labour city.

Oh, just when they were doing so well. I was saying all these nice things about Labour, and they say something stupid. There was no need to justify Goff’s presence – he is the Leader of the Opposition. But to claim justification on the basis it is a Labour city is stupid. Does that mean that if the earthquake had hit the North Shore of Auckland, Goff would not visit – or if it had been another Napier earthquake?

Incidentally Christchurch is not the old republic it used to be. National received 4,889 more party votes in the five urban seats, and if you include the two rural seats, they received 21,472 more party votes.

UPDATE: The four bills selected are:

There are four spots free on the order paper, so 4/38 bills will be selected. The 38 submitted bills are:

Crown Fibre Holdings have just announced three parties who are entering prioritised negotiations for the fibre roll-out. This will come as a surpise to those who assumed that Telecom/Chorus will win a nationwide contract. The three parties are:

• Alpine Energy (Timaru);
• The Central North Island Fibre Consortium (Hamilton – including Cambridge and Te Awamutu – Tauranga, New Plymouth, Wanganui, Hawera and Tokoroa); and
• Northpower (Whangarei).

This is a welcome step forward, and residents in those communities should be pleased.

CFH note:

“All shortlisted parties remain important contenders for future negotiations of binding agreements.  CFH is open to either a Telecom, New Zealand Regional Fibre Group solution, or some form of combination for the balance of the UFB project.”

So Telecom (and the NZ Regional Fibre Group) can still win the rest of NZ. If they did, presumably they would co-operate with the winners in the above areas. There is of course a risk Telecom/Chorus will try to undercut, if they don’t win a significant portion of the business. That will lead to infrastructure competition which is good in the short term, but inefficient in the long term. Services, rather than infrastructure, is where you want the competition to be.

A reader has asked me to blog this open letter to the NZ Rugby Football Union and Canterbury Rugby Union:

Gentlemen.

As we are all aware the people of Canterbury have suffered a terrible disaster, many are operating on adrenalin alone, many face weeks if not months of uncertainty and disruption.

Both the NZRU and the CRU are in an almost unique situation where you can offer the people of Canterbury a brief respite from their woes, with that in mind I have a suggestion.

On the 25th of September you have an afternoon game scheduled between Canterbury and Wellington, why not make attendance at this game free of charge for anybody who wants to come along.

Why not offer the people of Canterbury the chance to forget their problems for a couple of hours, perhaps you could take around donation buckets for those who wish to contribute to the mayoral fund, no pressure should be put on anybody to contribute and many of those who turn up will have lost everything, however there will be others who can and would donate.

Use could be made of returning or retired All Blacks, those who are not playing (from both teams) should be encouraged to walk among the crowd and spend some time chatting with the people.

I would also like you to speak with the Breweries and the soft drink companies, why not offer them the chance to do something great, why not offer them the chance to give everybody who turns up a free beer or soft drink.

Ideally we would have the All Black captain there and he would present Mayor Bob Parker with a cheque from the team, this would be an amazing gesture and one that would gain back many of the fans the All Blacks have lost over the years.

So there it is Gentlemen, how about you take up the challenge, why not show us that Rugby is not just about money these days, why not show all of us that the game of Rugby is still the game of the people.

I think it is a great idea, and hope it is given serious consideration.

The Timaru Herald editorial says:

Christchurch Mayor Bob Parker’s leadership has been flawless. His political arch rival Jim Anderton must feel like Cinderella stuck at home while the disaster ball is in full swing.

Certainly it would be hard to imagine Mr Anderton’s case for being a part-time mayor while he continued his MP duties now stacking up as a viable proposition.

It was questionable before the earthquake, and the disaster makes Mr Anderton’s position now look nonsensical.

It is the height of arrogance for Jim Anderton to continue with his insistence that the Mayoralty is a part-time job.

An MP is required to be in Wellington on house sitting weeks from Tuesday to Thursday. This would have a Mayor Anderton available Mondays and Fridays only during the week.

I know it is a bit unseemly to be politicking so soon after the quake, but the fact is that ballot papers go out next week. There are only a few days left for Jim Anderton to renounce his egotistical stance, and announce he will resign immediately as an MP, if he is elected Mayor.

Considering the Government is pouring the best part of $2 billion into the earthquake repairs, Anderton’s insistence he has to do both jobs to save the taxpayer $500,000 is laughable.

If Jim Anderton backs down, and announces he will resign immediately as an MP, if elected Mayor, then he will boost his chances considerably. If he continues to refuse to do so, then he will have no one but himself to blame if he loses.

Kiwis and Aussies have been ranked the most generous givers of time and money to charity.

The Charities Aid Foundation has published the World Giving Index. They use poll data from Gallup, and average out the percentages who say they have donated money, donated time and helped a stranger.

Overall, 20% of the world’s population had volunteered time in the month prior to interview, 30% of the world’s population had given money to charity, and 45% of the world’s population had helped a stranger. Australia and New Zealand are, jointly, the most ‘giving’ countries in the world. These countries both boast a World Giving Index score (the average of their scores on ‘giving money’, ‘giving time’, and ‘helping a stranger’) of 57%. Eight other countries from three regions also have a World Giving Index score of over 50%.

And some interesting correlations:

The link between the giving of money and happiness is stronger (a coefficient of 0.69) than the link between the giving of money and the GDP of a nation (0.58). It would be reasonable to conclude that giving is more an emotional act than a rational one.

The more generous you are, the happier you are.

The top ten countries are:

• 1= New Zealand 57%
• 1= Australia 57%
• 3= Ireland 56%
• 3= Canada 56%
• 5= Switzerland 55%
• 5= USA 55%
• 7 Netherlands 54%
• 8= UK 53%
• 8= Sri Lanka 53%
• 10 Austria 52%

The bottom eight countries are:

• 153 Madagascar 12%
• 152 Burundi 12%
• 150= Ukraine 13%
• 150= Serbia 13%
• 147= Greece 14%
• 147= Lithuania 14%
• 147= China 14%
• 146 Bangladesh 15%

The top country for giving money is Malta at 83%, followed by Netherlands at 77% and Uk and Thailand at 73%.

The top country for giving time is Turkmenistan at 61%, Sri Lanka 52% and Central African Republic 47%.

The top country for helping strangers is Sierra Leone at 75%, and Canada at 68%.

Labour have announced:

Labour Party organisations in these electorates will hold their confirmation meetings shortly:

• Bay of Plenty Carol Devoy-Heena

Lost in 2008 by 17,604 votes. Ranked 76th (2nd bottom). I think Tony Ryall can relax.

• Botany Koro Tawa

Ranked No 65. Lost by 10,872 in 2008. Not a lot of new blood coming through is there!

• Christchurch East Lianne Dalziel

An MP since 1990.

• Coromandel Hugh Kininmonth

Lost by 14,560 in 2008. Ranked 75th (third bottom)

• East Coast Moana Mackey

Lost by 6,413 to Anne Tolley. List MP since 2003.

• East Coast Bays Vivienne Goldsmith

Lost by 13,794 to Prince of Darkness. Ranked No 67 in 2008.

• Hamilton East Sehai Orgad

2007 President of compulsory Waikato Student’s Union. Stood for East ward of Hamilton City Council in 2007 and came 10th.

• Hauraki-Waikato Nanaia Mahuta

MP since 1996

• Helensville Jeremy Greenbrook-Held

Very appropriate Jeremy stands against John Key as he writes so many letters to the editor complaining about the Government.  2005 President of the compulsory VUWSA. Is standing for Henderson-Massey Local Board in 2010 elections.

A little known trivia fact is that a few years ago Jeremy and I co-authored a petition to Subway asking them to reverse their sacking of an employee for sharing a free $2 staff coke with a friend.

• Manukau East Ross Robertson

MP since 1987.

• New Plymouth Andrew Little

Former President of compulsory VUWSA, and NZUSA. Labour Party President.

• Rotorua Steve Chadwick

Lost her seat in 2008 by 5,065 votes. MP since 1999.

• Selwyn David Coates

Lost in 2008 by 11,075 votes.Ranked No 74 (fourth bottom) on list.

• Taranaki-King Country Rick Barker

Now this is weird. Barker presumably can’t get nominated again in Tukituki, so desperate to carry on has headed to the west coast. Has been an MP since 1993.

• Waimakariri Clayton Cosgrove

MP since 1999. Holding on with a 390 vote majority.

• Wellington Central Grant Robertson

Former President of compulsory OUSA and then NZUSA.

• Wigram Megan Woods

2007 Mayoral candidate against Bob Parker.

If the list above, is Labour rejuvenating, then someone has a sick sense of humour. Their only new candidates are from compulsory student associations.

Of their 2008 candidates, the ones standing again were all ranked in the bottom dozen, and lost by huge majorities.  Where are the Kate Suttons, Michael Woods, Conor Roberts, and Louisa Walls  who all actually have some talent?

NZPA reports:

Radio New Zealand’s Morning Report co-host Sean Plunket, who has been with the show from September 1996, signed off this morning.

He is reported to be considering joining Newstalk ZB, replacing Justin du Fresne as the new Wellington region talkback host.

He also has a new job presenting TV3’s weekend political show The Nation as well as writing a column for monthly Metro magazine.

“It has been an amazing 13 years and lasted longer than I expected it would,” her said on air this morning.

“I would hope that notwithstanding some massive development in the field of genetics, I will be the longest ever serving co-host with you on Morning Report,” he told long-serving colleague Geoff Robinson.

Heh.

Who is the interim host, starting tomorrow? And anyone know when RNZ plans to announce the permanent replacement?

Got 14/15 on this week’s quiz. Only 47 seconds – it was the final question that got me.

Stuff reports:

Building Minister Maurice Williamson cracked jokes about Muslims at an awards ceremony – just days before he accused Kiwis of racism over foreign ownership.

So what. First of all learn the difference between a religion and a race. Secondly cracking a joke about a race does not mean you are a racist.

I hate this desire some people seem to have, to turn MPs into bland robots that never show any personality or sense of humour.

Mr Williamson climbed on stage to present two awards and asked MC Oscar Kightley, the Samoan star of Sione’s Wedding, if his “papers were in order”.

Heh.

He went on to tell jokes making fun of Islam. One asked: “What is the difference between Muslims and Kiwis? Muslims get to commit adultery and get stoned, Kiwis get stoned and commit adultery.”

Some jokes can be hateful, or nasty. This was not one of them.

Mr Williamson also quipped about the weather being “Shi’ite in the morning and Sunni in the afternoon,” a reference to the two main denominations of the religion.

Heh. Personally I regard it as a good thing when one can tell jokes about a religion.

I once told a joke about how in heaven you get a better car, if you have never committed adultery, and the punchline was about Father McDonald rolling along on a skateboard. Does that denigate Catholics – of course not.

Kightley, a member of the comedy group Naked Samoans who write the animated series bro’Town, said he thought the remark directed at him was “a bit fresh”.

“I guess me, as an MC, was a natural target. He said it on stage. It didn’t really offend me. The last person you’d expect it from is the minister.”

Kightley said Mr Williamson’s performance seemed to go down well with the crowd. “As I recall he was very funny and the crowd liked it. I doubt he would have made those jokes in another setting.”

Of course, you choose your setting. In celebrity debates, almost anything goes. If you are an MC at function, you get to push the limit a bit. If you are the graduation speaker at a capping ceremony, then lave most of your jokes at home.

At the time, he didn’t think Mr Williamson had been drinking. “Someone told me later he’d had a few, but I didn’t think he was stumbling or slurring or anything. He was in fine fettle. But he was definitely in a nice and relaxed and jovial mood.”

I wasn’t at that event, but have been at many debates and the like with Maurice, and I can testify he does not need a drop of alcohol to let loose with a barrage of jokes.

Mr Williamson refused to comment last night. “I’m in a meeting about the Christchurch earthquake with a whole lot of people and can’t actually talk to you,” he said.

When approached later by a reporter and asked repeatedly about the remarks he walked away.

As he should. MPs should front up and answer questions on policy, on issues of substance. But why give any credibility to such a nonsense story.

Other guests said they believed Mr Williamson was drinking at the ceremony.

One said he thought the remarks were “not appropriate”.

“To be honest he was trying to be a bit of a lad.

“I couldn’t tell you he offended anyone. It was a load of builders. It was right at the end of the night and there was quite a lot of alcohol.”

So, no one actually claims they were offended. The worst quote they can find from someone is Maurice was a bit of a lad, at a conference of builders.

The problem with stories like this, is they turn MPs into dull automatons, who never say or do anything.