Dom Post Awards

The Dom Post published the political awards from teh Fairfax staff on Saturday. They were:

• Politician of the Year Award – Gerry Brownlee for how he handled the Government’s response to the Canterbury earthquake, the weeks working behind the scenes to negotiate the deal that saw The Hobbit pictures stay in New Zealand and his calm, measured and reassuring presence during the Pike River tragedy
• Backbencher of the Year – Green MP Keith Locke – forever challenging the Government – exactly what an Opposition backbencher should be doing
• Wally of the Year – Chris Carter
• Loser of the Year – ACT leader Rodney Hide
• The Frederick Forsyth ‘Day of the Jackass’ Award for Political Self-Assassination – David Garrett
• The Deep Throat award for all the wrong reasons – Labour MP Shane Jones
• The Johnnie Walker award for services to minibars – Climate Change Negotiations Minister Tim Groser
• The Keep New Zealand Beautiful award for the most manicured lawn – Pansy Wong’s husband Sammy who made 35 trips on the taxpayer to and from Christchurch in a year to mow the lawns and look after their former home.
• The Mule award for stubbornness – Manurewa MP George Hawkins
• The Biggest Twit award for gratuitous use of social media – Tau Henare for philosophical tweets such as “I hate waking up. But I spose if we didn’t wed be dead.” [sic] and “had Peiking [sic] Duck for tea. Yum.”
• The Ghandi award for religious tolerance – Maurice Williamson
• The Emily Post award for etiquette- Paul Quinn
• The not-quite Oscar Wilde award for wit – Kevin Taylor, the prime minister’s chief press secretary, for ill-temperedly branding Labour MP Pete Hodgson a “f . . . . . .” when the Pansy Wong scandal broke.
• The Mogadon award for dull political speechifying – Green MP Kennedy Graham
• The Epic McPhail award- To consultant Hugh McPhail
• The Birdbath award for shallow media analysis – To Labour’s Clare Curran, who spends huge amounts of energy criticising the mainstream media for its lack of depth, resourcing and breadth and then throws her weight behind every social media platform going. Go figure.
• St Jude award for championing hopeless cases- Tariana Turia, who added to her long list of supporting hopeless cases like Donna Awatere Huata by passionately defending Hone Harawira and Pansy Wong.
• The Lord Cardigan award for bravery in the valley of death – Speaker Lockwood Smith who, like the famous Light Brigade, charged into the fray on behalf of MPs travel perks . . . only to find he was alone.
• The Drinks Are On You award for personal generosity – Housing Minister Phil Heatley
• The “That’s All, Folks” Award – Warner Bros, for managing to wring more than $30m out of the cash-strapped Government to keep The Hobbit movies in New Zealand.

The Dominion Post also awards a weekly winner, loser and wally award. I’ve bene noting them down every week, and some interesting stats for 2010:

• Winner of the Week – John Key awarded it the most at 4 times. Next on two each were Kris Faafoi, Phil Goff, The Greens, Steven Joyce, David Parker, Heather Roy and Tariana Turia
• Loser of the Week – Phil Goff awarded it the most at 5 times. Second was Chris Carter at 3 times. On 2 each was Bill English, Rodney Hide and Nick Smith,
• Wally of the Week – John Key a clear “winner” getting it 7 times. Chris Carter 2nd with 4 times, Gerry Brownlee 3 times, Bill English Rodney Hide Matt McCarten and Lockwood Smith all got it twice each.

National MPs won winner of the week 12 times, loser of the week 14 times and wally of the week 22 times.

Labour MPs won winner of the week 8 times, loser of the week 10 times and wally of the week 5 times.

ACT MPs won winner of the week 3 times, loser of the week 3 times and wally of the week 5 times.

Green MPs won winner of the week 2 times, loser of the week 1 time and wally of the week no times.

Maori Party MPs won winner of the week 4 times, loser of the week 1 time and wally of the week 1 time.

Looking at those states, you wonder why on earth National is 24% ahead in the polls!