The Green Party self-assessment

February 10th, 2014 at 2:00 pm by David Farrar

The Green Party has a self-assessment that aspiring candidates are required to complete. One candidate has his on Facebook.

Most of the self-assessment is quite sensible and laudable, and in fact other parties would do well to consider requiring the same. Example questions include:

  • What professional, trade or life skills and experiences do you have which are relevant to being a Green candidate / MP?
  • What experience/skills do you have in public speaking, facilitating meetings, writing articles or media releases and cross cultural communication?
  • Which sources do you use for collecting political information, and how do you rate your skills in information collection and analysis?
  • What fundraising have you done for causes /organisations and how did you do it?
  • What are some examples of your ability to plan and to form and lead teams?

As I said, good questions to ask.

But it gets more fun on the personal qualities.

How do you walk the Green talk by living sustainably, fairly, democratically and peacefully?

My personal level of commitment to the Green Party is, in many ways, the greatest demonstration of living these values. 

Have long configured my life so that I live within walking distance of work to avoid motorised commuting and am able to ride my bicycle often; I eat minimal meat and never buy products of cruelty

So if you eat more than minimal meat, would this affect your list ranking?

I am generally a conscious politicised consumer and channel any recreational shopping urges that arise entirely into visits to op shops and recycling centres.

So if you shop at the Warehouse, does that

Rate yourself on the following personal attributes and qualities.

Personal Qualities

Rating 1(low) -5(high)

 Speaking succinctly in simple language – 3
Ability to prioritise work – 4
Ability to delegate work – 4
Co-operation, working well in a team – 4
Even temper – 4
Self-confidence – 3
Sense of humour – 5
Stamina – 3
Humility – 3
Ambition – 3
Commitment to working hard to get results – 4
Attracting and maintaining personal and political support –  4
Being enthusiastic and motivating others – 4

How do you rate your own humility? If you give yourself a 5 for humility, doesn’t that imply you are not humble if you think you are that good at humility?

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78 Responses to “The Green Party self-assessment”

  1. kowtow (8,449 comments) says:

    Aotearoan Khmer Rouge if you ask me.

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  2. lolitasbrother (691 comments) says:

    Ughh

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  3. toad (3,674 comments) says:

    As someone who knows Mark well, I think he’s undersold himself somewhat in his “personal qualities” self-assessment. I’d rate him a 5 for stamina and 4 or 5 for self confidence. He is correct, however, in assessing himself as having a wicked sense of humour.

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  4. burt (8,269 comments) says:

    toad

    If he can keep a dead pan serious face while saying socialism works when he probably knows that it’s failed every single time it’s been tried then I guess he probably he’s got one of the basics for having a good sense of humour…. Not cracking up while pulling peoples legs.

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  5. spanish_tudor (80 comments) says:

    What about personal qualities/skills like “dressing up as Ronald McDonald” or “vandalising billboards” or “”being paid by the taxpayer to collect signatures”? Or are those already a given when you get the self-assessment form?

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  6. jp_1983 (212 comments) says:

    So if this guy becomes an MP will he suddenly convert from ‘walking everywhere’ and avoiding motorized transport to joining the race to AirNZ Gold Elite Status?

    Or do you only say what you would do and do the opposite once you are in the tent?

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  7. burt (8,269 comments) says:

    jp_1983

    The first thing is getting his own property into the super scheme and renting it back to himself…. Once that is done he can start to tell everyone else how wrong such a practice is.

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  8. JC (955 comments) says:

    “I am generally a conscious politicised consumer and channel any recreational shopping urges that arise entirely into visits to op shops and recycling centres.”

    Move over, Uriah Heap.

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  9. thedavincimode (6,759 comments) says:

    Toorahlooralei rates a 5 for being a fuckwit, the aussie a 5 for being a bullshitting little weasel and arsehole, that other mad thing a 5 for being a mad hatter who can’t sing, but these (apparently) essential qualities appear to have been omitted. Why is this?

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  10. Psycho Milt (2,412 comments) says:

    “I eat minimal meat”

    He says this like it’s a good thing.

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  11. thedavincimode (6,759 comments) says:

    Milt

    I think he means that he doesn’t eat much cock. So in a sense, it is a good thing, but probably better still if he didn’t eat any.

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  12. srylands (410 comments) says:

    I know the “Green Taliban” and similar insults can be seen as OTT, and they really piss off Green supporters. However, if you look at the full list of Green policies, and imagine them fully implemented, New Zealand would resemble a totalitarian agrarian society. Jokes aside, we would look something more like Pol Pot’s Cambodia than modern day New Zealand. I had a Green Party supporter tell me a couple of weeks ago that supermarkets should be nationalised and the Government should control the price, quality, and quantities of all food sold. He was serious.

    When you consider that they have (about) 10% support, I can only assume that at least half that support has no clue about the policies. This soft support is a mixture of the young and confused, and naïve, prosperous, but politically unaware Pakeha who think the Greens are about making the flowers grow. I have met members of both these camps, so I know they exist.

    I don’t understand why National doesn’t aggressively target this “soft” Green support by hammering the odious policies. But I’m no politician. They must have their reasons. Maybe DPF can provide some insights.

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  13. Peter (1,712 comments) says:

    “I am generally a conscious politicised consumer and channel any recreational shopping urges that arise entirely into visits to op shops and recycling centres”

    Beats being unconscious whilst consuming, I guess.
    What is a politicised consumer? Someone who wears a Dave Cunliffe t-shirt when checking out the new season handbags at Louis Vuitton?
    Channel any recreational shopping urges that arise? We don’t want any urges arising. That will not do.

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  14. backster (2,171 comments) says:

    Perhaps an independent researcher should assess the current elected members( any volunteers). I can’t see Ms Turei setting a very good example with “I live within walking distance of work to avoid motorised commuting and am able to ride my bicycle often; I eat minimal meat and never buy products of cruelty”

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  15. johnwellingtonwells (137 comments) says:

    My God its hard to be humble, when I’m doing the best that I can

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  16. greenjacket (465 comments) says:

    Will they do psycometric testing of their candidates?
    A serious question – most management posiitons require candidates to have a high level of English and numeric competency and strong reasoning abilities (be it an IQ test or whatever). Why should candidates for a political party be any different?
    .
    It is pretty obvious that Labour don’t do it.

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  17. Elaycee (4,392 comments) says:

    I would have thought the most urgent personal attribute(s) the Gweens would be seeking from any ‘newbie’, would be those currently missing from their current line-up:

    Financial literacy
    A grasp of business basics
    The ability to present a viewpoint without having to resort to whining about ‘wacism’
    A cogent understanding of Law and Order (incl. Maritime)
    Sanity

    There….. sorted.

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  18. unaha-closp (1,164 comments) says:

    Being a Green there should be a rating for capability of cognitive dissonance.

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  19. Pete George (23,559 comments) says:

    I don’t understand why National doesn’t aggressively target this “soft” Green support by hammering the odious policies.

    Both National and Greens have started their respective targeting of each other, but it’s early days in election year.

    After the last election Greens were confident their support was trending upwards, but that hasn’t really happened despite at times appalling Labour decisions and tactics.

    This term has seen a change of general perception of Greens from a quaint mainly environmental party to an ambitious social and financial wannabee. There’s already reservations growing about their suitability to be in Government with significant influence.

    Greens remain the beneficiary of Labour’s continuing ineptitude but that could be all that’s holding their support up now that more are aware of their new socialist emphasis.

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  20. Tom Jackson (2,553 comments) says:

    most management posiitons require candidates to have a high level of English and numeric competency and strong reasoning abilities (be it an IQ test or whatever).

    I’ve been managed by loads of people and I’m calling shenanigans on this.

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  21. davidp (3,581 comments) says:

    How about the question about housing…

    Score your current housing:
    1. Suburban home.
    2. Tiny inner-city apartment.
    3. Large inner-city apartment owned by Green Party superannuation scheme but paid for by Parliamentary Services.
    4. Yurt, or hut made of organic dung bricks.
    5. Castle.

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  22. Elaycee (4,392 comments) says:

    @davidp: Perhaps we could also add… dress sense:

    1. Jeans and Polo shirt
    2. Suit from Hallensteins / Glassons
    3. Jacket from Barkers / Jacqui E
    4. Dressed up to resemble a medieval moon-bat
    5. Designer range from the Great Outdoors Company

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  23. Tom Jackson (2,553 comments) says:

    And

    4. How are you personally contributing to preventing the destruction of Gaia by overpopulation?

    (a) I use contraception
    (b) I practice only “unchristian” forms of lovemaking
    (c) I’m gay
    (d) I try to think about Metiria/Russell during sex to avoid ejaculation.
    (e) I’m in the Green Party. Do you honestly think I ever get laid?

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  24. Ashley Schaeffer (487 comments) says:

    How does one live democratically exactly?

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  25. thedavincimode (6,759 comments) says:

    Ashley

    By having what 90% of the voting population want subordinated to the wants of 10% of the voting population.

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  26. Tom Jackson (2,553 comments) says:

    How does one live democratically exactly?

    Russ does what the majority of his multiple personalities decide upon.

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  27. Simon (721 comments) says:

    “How do you walk the “Green talk” by living sustainably, fairly, democratically and peacefully?”

    This is self criticism not assessment.

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  28. spanish_tudor (80 comments) says:

    Please rate your facial hair (wimmin only):

    1 – My face is as smooth as an unsmacked baby’s bottom
    2 – I have a few too many male hormones and bleach any facial hair with a dye made from tree roots
    3 – I let it grow freely like all the other hair on my body
    4 – Paul Henry thinks I am a man
    5 – I look like Chewbacca

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  29. Peter (1,712 comments) says:

    Your preferred form of transport is:

    a) taxi
    b) limousine
    c) aircraft
    d) riding a wave of pure hypocrisy

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  30. Reid (16,447 comments) says:

    When you see an oil rig you’ll:

    a) cry like a little girl
    b) chain yourself to it and hope it’s not the bit that flames off the excess gas
    c) buy a four litre pack of oil from the service station, pour it onto the surrounding water, take a photo and call the media
    d) all of the above

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  31. Peter (1,712 comments) says:

    You encounter a steaming hot, fresh bath. Do you:

    a) cry
    b) scream
    c) come over all passive aggressive
    d) accuse it of racism

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  32. ciaron (1,431 comments) says:

    d) riding a wave of pure hypocrisy

    Just about cried and wet myself laughing… Top effort, Sirs.

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  33. Peter (1,712 comments) says:

    Just about cried and wet myself laughing… Top effort, Sirs.

    :)

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  34. David Garrett (7,271 comments) says:

    toadie: Why are you so frigthened of using your real name here? It seems “Mark” doesnt mind being openly linked to the Green Lunatics you punch your card for…

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  35. davidp (3,581 comments) says:

    David G>It seems “Mark” doesnt mind being openly linked to the Green Lunatics you punch your card for

    Huh? When I visit the page I get the following…

    “The page you requested cannot be displayed right now. It may be temporarily unavailable, the link you clicked on may have expired, or you may not have permission to view this page.”

    I suspect that this Green bloke realised that he’d self-assessed himself so extravagantly that his humility score wasn’t looking credible. So he made his page private.

    Either that or he is anticipating the FaceBook ban. Delete your profile before Cunliffe does it for you.

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  36. nasska (11,491 comments) says:

    DG

    Be fair! If you were associated with a half baked bunch of soap dodging Luddites would you use your real name? :)

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  37. David Garrett (7,271 comments) says:

    Nasska: That’s more difficult to imagine that my theoretically returning to the Holy Mother Church and taking a vow of chastity…But I think I know the reason; it’s the same as the Professor’s (you know the one)…They are quite happy to joust with us, but are fucking terrified of their acolytes Googling them as part of the regular ideology check and finding that they regularly engage with the infidel…

    I wonder if there is some secret order out which forbids the Taliban from engaging with us??

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  38. nasska (11,491 comments) says:

    ….”I wonder if there is some secret order out which forbids the Taliban from engaging with us??”….

    Definitely a possibility DG. Years ago, as a truck driver, I occasionally picked up consignments of shrubs from a Fielding nursery for delivery to various garden centres. The nursery was owned & staffed by Bretheren or some equivalent sect & the plebs were not allowed to communicate with the public. That was left to a couple of the elders.

    The Green sect as true totalitarians may be organised along similar lines. Toad as their sole Kiwiblog spokesman is probably sent for reprogramming on a regular basis just to ensure that he hasn’t been corrupted by the enemy. :)

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  39. burt (8,269 comments) says:

    Speaking of the Green Party Super Scheme. The income from Parliamentary Services ( which is revenue to the scheme ) – what proportion of that is paid in Tax – Surely it must be at least 15% !!!!!!

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  40. toad (3,674 comments) says:

    @burt 5:18 pm

    Burt (and others who continually refer to the supposed Green Super Scheme), get with the times.

    There is no such scheme and there hasn’t been for years. Around the time Bill English was outed for rorting his accommodation allowance, the Greens decided their Super Scheme’s property investments, while being totally within the rules, was not a good look so closed down the scheme.

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  41. ciaron (1,431 comments) says:

    Exactly what rules did Bill English break with his arrangement, Toad?

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  42. David Garrett (7,271 comments) says:

    You haven’t told us why you dont use you real name here Toadie…Get it off your chest man…you will feel better!

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  43. toad (3,674 comments) says:

    @ciaron 6:09 pm

    This one:

    Ministerial Services asked Mr English to sign a declaration that he did not have a pecuniary interest in the family trust. He did so, and attached a copy of the advice he had received about what amounted to a beneficial interest in a trust for the purposes of Standing Orders. Having received that declaration, Ministerial Services got a market evaluation of the rent, took over the existing rental agreement, and provided the house as a ministerial residence.

    In our view, the advice that Mr English relied on to make his declaration was not applicable to this situation and was based on too narrow a test for the Ministerial Services’ situation. We consider that Mr English does have an indirect financial interest in the trust.

    Essentially, English kept his Ministerial portfolios because, although he had signed a false declaration, he did so having received incorrect advice from Ministerial Services so could argue he did not sign the false declaration knowing it to be false.

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  44. David Garrett (7,271 comments) says:

    toadie….you sad fuck….Don’t be so bashful….

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  45. axeman (252 comments) says:

    » What professional, trade or life skills and experiences do you have which are relevant to being a Green candidate / MP?

    YAY!!! Doesn’t MMP Rock! With­out it we wouldn’t have peo­ple who dress (and get arrested) as Ronald McDon­ald sit­ting on a 140k+ salary after grad­u­at­ing work­ing as a hos­pital porter.

    Gweens; “They claim to be green because they’re too yellow to admit that they’re red”

    http://static.stuff.co.nz/1264646089/071/3272071.jpg

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  46. ciaron (1,431 comments) says:

    Essentially, English kept his Ministerial portfolios because, although he had signed a false declaration, he did so having received incorrect advice from Ministerial Services so could argue he did not sign the false declaration knowing it to be false.

    Translation:
    1 He got some incorrect advice.
    2 ….
    3 therefore, he knew the advice was wrong and ipso facto lied.

    I say chap, are you accusing the finance minister of deception? better have something better than that link.

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  47. thedavincimode (6,759 comments) says:

    Toad

    That is complete bullshit as anyone who knows a smattering of trust law will tell you. He did not have a pecuniary interest in the trust. He was not a beneficiary or a trustee. The opinion of some pointy head auditor who is sufficiently stupid to want to apply an accounting gloss that exists for entirely different reasons to a matter of interpretation based in law is not relevant here. The fact that you are too stupid to grasp the point or prefer to spin it is however, predictable.

    That is not to say that English was not stupid. He was. He was stupid to not put himself above the type of money grubbing behaviour that we have come to associate with melon property-owning trusts.

    Perhaps the best thing you could do is just fuck off.

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  48. Manolo (13,755 comments) says:

    More green bullshit from toad, the Luddite bullshit artist.

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  49. toad (3,674 comments) says:

    @thedavincimode 7:01 pm

    I’m just quoting the Auditor-General’s report, as you well know.

    Oh, and we are into personal attacks, “[p]erhaps the best thing you could do is just fuck off.”

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  50. toad (3,674 comments) says:

    @David Garrett 6:15 pm

    Why don’t you ask that of the many RWNJs who comment here under pseudonyms? Start with thedavincimode, then Manolo, unaha-closp, kowtow, spanish_tudor. DPF’s blog rules allow people to comment under pseudonyms, so why are you picking on me in particular?.

    Anyway, the answer is two-fold:

    1) I have commented under this pseudonym for many years, not just here but on blogs that can hardly be described as right wing, such as The Dim Post and The Standard. People in the blogosphere know me for my pseudonym, not for my real name.

    2) There are some RWNJs in the Kiwiblog comments threads who really scare me personally. I am on the open electoral roll, and don’t want anybody firebombing my house. If you are online Andrei, Redbaiter, Lucia Maria, Fletch; what are your thoughts re that political tactic, in relation to abortion clinics, for example?

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  51. ciaron (1,431 comments) says:

    Geez toad, right into the insinuations tonight, aren’t ya!

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  52. Grendel (1,002 comments) says:

    hah, toad thinks a ‘right winger’ (so presumably someone who beleives in property rights) will firebomb his house. nice try, its not our lot running around the uraweras playing with guns and molotovs.

    Now he might wonder why i use a pseudonym. well its easy, the greens and other lefties will actually try and ruin people that disagree with them, and resorting to violence to get their way is considered perfectly ok. i am self employed in wellington and dont need the greenshirts trying to ruin me.

    he is also vague about the greens super scheme. what he should have said is:

    ” around the time that Bill English who had acted on advice from ministerial services based on a long term convention that was not technically in the rules, but was signed off by 4 different speakers, was thrown under the bus by the media, who conveniently ignored what goff other mps were doing, the greens had the same spotlight played on them. the media did not care, despite the fact that the greens were extra rorting the the allowances system to ensure they got allowances for longer than they might otherwise have if the properties were not in the super scheme, and also went against the line the greens were taking against property investment (and lets not forget the time they tried to double claim for the allowance).

    a little while later when they figured the media would pay no notice, they _might_ have closed it down.

    anything you try and claim about English, the greens skullfucked the intent of the rules to give themselves even more taxpayer money while trying to fuck over property investors who did not have the benefit of being able to sup at the taxpayers trough.

    i do wonder, based on that assessment, how the fuck Hughes and Delahunty got anywhere. was ability to snivel and suck up a lot considered a postive trait for hughes? and did the greens do some polling that showed they had a gap in the crazy old lady demographic?

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  53. toad (3,674 comments) says:

    @Grendel 8:19 pm

    I am actually thinking about the extremist fundamentalist religious element that frequents the comments threads here, not the neolibs like you who (despite everything else I disagree with about) do respect property rights.

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  54. Say Goodbye to Hollywood (562 comments) says:

    This would be the only time I have agreed with Toad. If he / she wants to use a pseudonym that’s his/ her prerogative.

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  55. spanish_tudor (80 comments) says:

    @toad 7:15pm

    Whoa…. not too bad for a novice! I’ve only started commenting on KB today (after reading the blog for years), and you’ve labelled me as a RWNJ after only three posts. I shall wear it as a badge of honour; obviously I hit a nerve.

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  56. big bruv (13,886 comments) says:

    Toad

    I do find it interesting that you are happy to point the bone at English when your own MP’s are well versed in the arts of ripping off the tax payer via housing rorts.

    Still, it does not matter if they are lefties ripping off the system does it.

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  57. nasska (11,491 comments) says:

    toad

    ….”I am actually thinking about the extremist fundamentalist religious element that frequents the comments threads “….

    That’s okay then….I was about to complain about being left off your list of RWNJs. :)

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  58. OneTrack (3,089 comments) says:

    toad – “..and don’t want anybody firebombing my house…”

    Projecting typical left-wing strategies onto the right …?

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  59. big bruv (13,886 comments) says:

    Did the ever expanding female co-leader of the Greens ever actually deny vandalising National Party billboards during the last election?

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  60. Johnboy (16,529 comments) says:

    Target for firebombing!

    http://homepages.which.net/~ian/toad.html

    “Leave the food alone, tho’. Interestingly, the Floridian equivalent is in Epcot in the UK ‘Land’ where the food is – if anything – even worse. ”

    Metiria has been eating the sausages here! :)

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  61. Johnboy (16,529 comments) says:

    Evening again minus….see Beer Pong comment! :)

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  62. wat dabney (3,756 comments) says:

    A commitment to violence is the common attribute of these fake environmentalists.

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  63. nasska (11,491 comments) says:

    You’re not the only one being hit JB….who have we both pissed off? :)

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  64. Simon (721 comments) says:

    The Green party self assessment check list. Answer yes or agree to any of these and you have what it takes to be a Green MP

    1. Are you a clueless & unemployable PhD?
    2. Are you over weight with an eating disorder but can’t stop telling healthy people what and what not to eat?
    3. Do you secretly despise the Chinese because of their growing middle class and you know they wont tolerate your bullshit?
    4. If you like something it should be a human right if you dont like something it should be banned?
    5. Printing money is a viable economic plan
    6. Rising living standards make your skin crawl
    7. Can you smugly talk about climate change, peak oil & green jobs ad nauseam framing these “talking points” with out any reference to the real world?

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  65. Johnboy (16,529 comments) says:

    It can’t be toadie he’s too busy with buckets of sand and laying out his garden hose for the firebombers! :)

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  66. Johnboy (16,529 comments) says:

    Silly thing about Toadies attitude is that his hall is more likely to burn down from the extra ten k of sausages Metiria tosses on the barbie than a firebomb attack from the crazed neo-lib nutters! :)

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  67. nasska (11,491 comments) says:

    Nah…..I’m sure it’s not toad. Conservative Godnutter probably.

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  68. Johnboy (16,529 comments) says:

    Not Red surely….after all the weasel words I have said about him? :)

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  69. nasska (11,491 comments) says:

    The ingratitude of the proletariat JB. :)

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  70. Johnboy (16,529 comments) says:

    They just don’t realise how lucky they are that we let a few shekels filter down through the cracks in the glass ceiling to keep them in fags and the odd lotto ticket so they too can one day aspire to the heights that we occupy! :)

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  71. toad (3,674 comments) says:

    @big bruv 8:46 pm

    It does, and that is why the Greens stopped it. Perfectly legal, but not a good look politically.

    As opposed to English, which was illegal, but according to the Auditor-General not intentionally so.

    But I do wish you would stop trying points scoring on this issue BB. No Party has got a completely clean nose on this, and I, for one, am glad they all (WinstonFirst excepted) seem committed to cleaning their act up.

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  72. toad (3,674 comments) says:

    @Johnboy 9:25 pm

    Yeah, you are usually good for a politically incorrect laugh (barf!).

    @big bruv 9:04 pm

    Why are you so hung up on Metiria’s body size? Surely, what she says and does is what counts.

    Or is it open season on Gerry Brownlee and Paula Bennett now too?

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  73. Psycho Milt (2,412 comments) says:

    Or is it open season on Gerry Brownlee and Paula Bennett now too?

    Not Gerry Brownlee – right-wingers have no problem with fat men, it’s fat women that repel them (Paula Bennett and Judith Collins excepted, natch).

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  74. itstricky (1,830 comments) says:

    (Paula Bennett and Judith Collins excepted, natch).

    Well, I don’t blame them, they do wear nice jackets. Takes pounds off.

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  75. srylands (410 comments) says:

    “Why are you so hung up on Metiria’s body size? ”

    Because fat people with enormous carbon footprints who lecture others about what to eat, how agriculture should be organised, and who are generally annoying, are skating on thin ice. So it is not the fat per se. Rather, it is the icing on the cake, so to speak.

    Does that clear things up for you?

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  76. wat dabney (3,756 comments) says:

    Toad,

    Is it true that Metiria is called “Evita” behind her back?

    New Zealand’s very own fascist clothes-horse.

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  77. Manolo (13,755 comments) says:

    Is it true that Metiria is called “Evita” behind her back?

    Heavyita seems even more accurate.

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  78. Ryan Sproull (7,135 comments) says:

    Heavyita seems even more accurate.

    Why is that?

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