Jimmy Kimmel got some parents to send in videos of their kids after telling them they had eaten all their Halloween candy. Superb.Tags: Jimmy Kimmel
Archive for the ‘Humour’ Category
By John Stringer
Tags: Cartoon; John Stringer
Very good. Taken off Conrad Hackett on Twitter.No tag for this post.
The Press reports:
A University of Canterbury student club has offended “everyone possible” with cars and costumes poking fun at women, Islam, Malaysia Airlines and the deadly ebola crisis.
The RoUndie 500, organised by the Engineering Society (Ensoc), has caused a stir with newly-formed feminist club FemSoc after its members saw a car showing images of about 30 women ranked by supposed desirability.
It was then discovered the club was encouraging participants to choose themes “the more inappropriate the better” on its Facebook page ahead of last weekend’s event.
One of FemSoc’s 400 members, Annamarie Moot, 20, said the event “ticked off every bad thing in the book”.
There were also teams using themes around ebola, Malaysia Airlines and Islam.
“They’re just offending everyone possible,” Moot said.
Yep, that is what offensive humour is about. Shall we ban 7 Days, because it also has offensive humour?
She had heard some girls pictured on the car were friends of the team and would have known about it “but it’s still very degrading”.
So she’s offended on behalf of the girls – even though the girls may actually have approved themselves.Tags: inappropriate humour
Satirist Ben Uffindell writes:
If you’ve ever lived in a household, chances are you’ve played a game called Monopoly, a faux contest where families set out to ruin the free market by establishing unfair wealth distribution and enacting strange laws that force people to sleep at the nearest hotel and pay rent for a bizarre number of houses against their will. In real life, we call this “Auckland.”
I’ve played enough games of Monopoly to know that, at some point, someone gets so far ahead that everyone gets extremely bored.
It’s then common practice for the winner to do something outrageously stupid to make the game more competitive and keep everyone else interested.
Prime Minister: if the Government is truly a household, then it’s time for you to be that guy.
Because I often wonder, John, can this really be any fun for you? Are you the kind of person who enjoys beating your children at complex games of strategy? Surely not.
Clearly gifting the campaign of their dreams to your opponents, while having allegations drip-fed against your Government, and a senior minister resigning, simply wasn’t enough.
If you’re going to make this a fair contest, you’re going to have to step your game up and do the equivalent of mortgaging all your properties to buy back the electric company.
Hell, why don’t you literally buy back the electric company? Punch a kid live on television? Film a series of ads in which you endorse David Cunliffe? Take up smoking? Not tobacco; meth.
Just something. Please. Anything.
The only problem with Ben’s plea is that MMP is different to monopoly. In monopoly the person with the most money (votes) wins. In MMP the five players who came 2nd to 6th can team up, pool their votes (money) and be declared the winner.
It is still a close race. Not between National and Labour, but between National and Labour, Greens, NZ First, Mana and Internet.
Tags: Ben Uffindell, Election 2014, monopoly
Ben Uffendell from The Civilian Party writes in the NZ Herald:
How you perceive this election really depends on your political allegiance.
If you’re a big National supporter, you’ve got nothing to worry about, and subsequently nothing to invest in.
If you hate National, there’s a high chance you think this is the most important election of our generation, that this is the most right-wing government in New Zealand history, and there’s a vague chance your house is bugged.
I envy you in your fantasy world, Martyn Bradbury, because if you’re absolutely anyone else, it’s boring.
And it’s not just boring because it isn’t truly competitive; it’s boring because the issues I heard discussed on Thursday night were the same four or five issues I’ve heard discussed for the entirety of my life, and the changes being proposed in those areas – while significant in the context of the status quo – are actually very minor in the scale of possible change. Sometimes I just wish John Key would come out and say: “We’re selling it. We’re selling it all. Everything. To Burger King.”
Perhaps I just wish our elections were more ambitious, less safe, bold, with no pale pastels.
There was a time when we had the courage and lack of foresight to completely overhaul our social and economic structures.
Whatever happened to that? We once had a Prime Minister who called an election while drunk. How have we fallen so far since then?
If it takes six years to balance a budget, and another six years to build some houses, then I’ll be long dead before anything exciting or significant happens.
Oh might not be that long. Think if there is a Government propped up by the Internet Mana Party and a Judge rules that Kim Dotcom can be extradited, meaning the decision then goes to the Minister of Justice. Then you’ll have fireworks!
And if National or Labour don’t want to commit to actually changing anything, they could at least make us look interesting. Rebrand.
Get rid of the kiwi and replace it with a tiger or something. When we look at ourselves, do we really see a bird that can’t fly? Actually, maybe.
Or how about replacing the national anthem with something that has a smooth, hip-hop beat?
No one listens to the old one in their spare time, and half of it I don’t even understand what the words mean.
Hell, I don’t understand the Maori version, either.
Vote Civilian for a new national anthem!Tags: The Civilian
Grant McDougall at Public Address has a blog on which beer each party might be. His picks are:
- National – Tui
- Labour – Monteith’s
- Greens – Emerson’s
- United Future – Rheineck
- NZ First – Lion Brown
- ACT – Budweiser
- Internet-Mana – Boundary Road
- Maori – DB Draught
- Conservatives – Steinlager Lite
His explanations for each are amusing.
United Future is most hard done by. I recall Rheineck, but not fondly.Tags: beer
We all know this verse from Lord of the Rings:
Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky, Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone, Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die, One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them, One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
A reader has sent in a NZ version, in case the left win:
Three Rings for Internet Mana living a lie, Seven for the Unions with their hearts of stone, Nine for Mortal Business doomed to die, One for the CTU on its dark throne In the Land of Labour where the Unions lie.
One Contract to rule them all, One Contract to find them, One Contract to bring them all and in the darkness bind them In the Land of Labour where the Unions lie.
I love it.
Tags: Humour, Lord of the Rings
~ Squeaky Lino intheHallsofPowerSqueaky Lino
Good news for fake news, with a satirical political party successfully registering just in time for the election.
The Electoral Commission has announced the Civilian Party has got enough members on board to contest the election.
The party was born out of parody news website The Civilian, and promises free ice cream for everyone, and making the rest of New Zealand independent from Hamilton.
I’m glad they made it. Of all the joke parties standing for Parliament, they’re the only funny one!Tags: Election 2014, The Civilian
By Squeaky Lino (In the Halls of Power)Squeaky Lino
Courtesy of John StringerTags: John Stringer
Not a bad parody of Lorde by “Weird AL” Yankovic. The tinfoil hats seems politically relevant at the moment!Tags: Lorde